{Im}patiently Waiting

Period #2 showed up on Feb. 21st. I started BCPs for the FET on the 23rd, and I just took my last one this past Saturday. I had a baseline appointment set for Monday at 9:30 am. Unfortunately, I was unable to go because AF has not shown since I stopped the BCP.

Ugh. The wait is killing me!!




Bossy Bud

The worst feeling...

Well, here I am... 15 days away from what would've been my EDD. I feel like crap. I think I am doing a pretty good job at keeping it together, what with all the Baby Shower pics being posted on FB, and the fact that Similac decided to send me a sample box in the mail today (AHHH!!!!!). These constant reminders really SUCK. And there is nothing I can do about any of it. What also sucks is the fact that AF is still MIA. F.M.L.!!!!!

I am really trying to stay positive and remember that things will get better. I visited the Doctor on Monday in preparation for a diet program I will be starting at the end of this week. He is a former gynocologist who has started a special diet program. I told him about my situation with PCOS and my MC. He told me that the two best ways to get my PCOS under control are to take my metformin and lose weight, and they both go hand in hand. He advised that I start taking one, 500mg, pill a day to start, and work my way up to the 2 500mg a day. He also said that the good news is I know I can get pregnant, and he believes it will happen again. He said he would run all my blood tests and look for even the smallest issue with my thyroid, etc. to make sure that is not a contributing factor. Honestly, it seems VERY promising, and I am hopeful. Once I get started on this, and get a grip on it, I think I'll officially make my appointment at the IVF clinic to run tests there, and start seeing what else I can do to help my situation.

Thankfully, this (and work) is keeping me so busy that I don't have much time to think about my Pity Party... but I know I will not be able to forget. It's going to be difficult, but I just have to get through this and keep my eye on a positive future.

Feeling strange...

I don't know if it's the "new school year" germs or what... But I have been feeling a bit funky lately.

Sunday, I woke up feeling "so-so", with a pounding headache (not migraine just headache) that turned into some weird chills (my lip felt as if it had no circulation) that became nausea that made me run to the bathroom to throw up a bit. After all that, I slept it off and felt better, resuming my week as I normally do. I have had a headache, pretty much, every day since then. Today, I took a little nap to prepare for a dinner with friends, and upon waking up, I was totally dizzy and nauseous. I had some chewable Pepto, went to the bathroom and lost some of it, then went to the dinner. As we arrived, I wasn't feeling too hot, but a while into it I was pretty much better... Probably 90%.

Does this seem strange?? I mean I know there is a virus going around, but I have yet to feel any "flu" symptoms... It's just the headaches and nausea. A part if me kinda feels like I should run to the drug store and pick up some tests to POAS. I may just have to, tomorrow.

And, on another note - as if it wasn't obvious by this post - still no sign of AF... :-/ The waiting game continues.




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Trying something new

In my last post, I mentioned a medication by the name of Vitex. Since then, I have visited my local GNC store, and purchased a bottle. I took one today, for the first time, and feel fine... Therefore, tomorrow, I will be starting my first full day taking 3.

Because my knowledge on this supplement is limited, I started doing a little reading in reference to how Vitex works in correlation with PCOS. I found that, even though it may not be the only thing needed to assist women who are suffering infertility thanks to PCOS, it may be a piece of the larger puzzle. Check out this article I read:

http://www.trying-to-conceive.com/alternative-treatments/vitex-pcos-success/

I am still planning on making an appointment with the Fertility clinic to run tests and figure out a game plan for my crazy fertility... Buy I figured this wouldn't hurt!!! In the meantime, I'll keep reading up on it. I am also curious to know what Doctors say about this pill... I guess we'll just have to wait and see :)




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Getting desperate... :-/

We are officially on CD100. Yup! Not a single sign of AF since her last appearance in late May. And even though AF is not the best company to keep, I kind of need her to show up sometime. Anytime. Soon?

I am planning on calling the IF clinic, a former bud and friend recommended, this week... Maybe they will be able to help me :-/ this is just all so frustrating.

I was doing some research on natural remedies to make AF start, and read about a natural remedy called "Vitex". It is supposed to help regulate your hormones and many women with PCOS swear by it... Have any of you had any experience with this? I would be very interested to hear what your take on it is.

Meanwhile, I'll just keep waiting and see what happens with the IF Doctor.




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DISlike :(

You know those days when you feel like everyone around you is getting pregnant except you??? Well TODAY is one of those days... And it SUCKS!!! :-/

It also doesn't help that I STILL haven't seen any sign of AF. Not even a Post Card.

I am usually a pretty happy and chipper person... But today I feel angry and bitter. Granted, I do feel happy for those that are expecting, but I can't help but wonder when it will be my turn.

Don't mind me... I'll just be in the corner... Sulking :-/



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CD88?!?

That's right... STILL no sign of AF... :-/ Truth be told, I am starting to get restless. I HATE it when my period decides to take an extended vacation... ESPECIALLY when we are TTC.

But now, it's all going to change!!! I am going to make an appointment at the IF Clinic a former Bud recommended to me, so I can get some assistance with this TTC thing... Hopefully it'll work :)

That's about all for now... Still (im)patiently waiting for AF to come naturally before she needs to come by force, being read her rights and all ;)




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Sitting in the Waiting Room.

Not literally...

I have to be honest... lately, my posts have really SUCKED :-/ I have had NOTHING interesting to say, except that AF is super late. You want stats??? Today is CD79, and I am 20 days late, based on my last funked up cycle. Thanks, Period Tracker. I can always count on you to keep things in perspective... o.O

So yea, I am sitting around waiting for AF to finally show up... and also waiting to see if I'll have a job next year. I am a Teacher in South Florida, and the job situation is a bit sketchy... Hopefully, I will get some good news this week. I NEED my Health Insurance coverage to continue so that I can visit a local IVF clinic nearby for a consultation... A former Bud, and friend, recommended them to me. Because of a very successful round of IUI, she now has a beautiful little boy to call her own :) So, hopefully they can help me see the "big picture" of my fertility, soon. :)

Since it's still Summer Break, I have been staying up VERY late... sometimes later than I even should. And of course, I get some time to watch TV, and watch whatever I like, I may add ;) I caught an Episode of Guiliana & Bill, based on Bill and Guiliana Rancic. As some of you may or may not know, they have struggled with their own infertility issues, and were planning to take a year off of TTC (because of all the stress and heartbreak it brought upon them). She mentioned this book called "Making Babies" which seems really interesting. So, I thought I'd share it with my fellow Buds and readers. The authors are Sami David and Jill Blakeway.

photo credit

I was trying to find a Kindle edition, but it is not available... however, the iBooks app on the iPhone and iPad does have it available. I haven't read it yet, but I have previewed it. It seems very promising and interesting. Have you heard about this book? Any positive (or negative) thoughts about it?

Anyway, I guess that's all for now... I kind of have to wait until I find out about my Job Situation before I can move on with my TTC and Fertility issues... which is extremely unfortunate. Hopefully, I will know what is going on (with both work and my health) soon.

Same song and dance :-/

Here we go again... 65 dsys into the current cycle, and no sign of AF. Based on what my cycles were pre-miscarriage, I am exactly a month late, since day 35 of my cycle landed on June 30th, one month ago.

I finally started taking metformin again, and am trying to take it easy with that. It had made me feel a bit "blah" in the past... So far, it hasn't been as bad as the last time. I haven't thrown up once, and have only had minor diarrhea, so I am not complaining too much. However, I am feeling super bloated and icky, and even nauseous, this evening :-/ some moments are better than others, I guess.

I am going to keep working on it, so hopefully we can be pregnant by Christmas. That would be the BEST gift ever. In the meantime, I am going to be taking the metformin, and trying to stick to a "diabetic" diet, as much as possible... I did read that such a diet is recommended while on metformin and while TTC (for women with PCOS) ;) let's see how it goes!




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TTC Rollercoaster... or more like White Water Raft :-/

Hello, everyone.

First off, let me send out a big HELLO to all my fellow buds who are expecting... I have been reading up on your recent updates, and am so happy to hear that you are all doing so well. I am particularly glad to hear of Cactus Bud's Progress, especially since we were supposed to be due around the same time... ;) It's all you, CB!!!

I know, I've been a little lost lately. When I returned from being out of town, I was sucked into the black hole of "busy". I have been so incredibly busy, I actually h

ave no idea where all my time has gone! Oh well... However, I am NOT happy to report that AF is late 19 days AGAIN. I have POAS two times since and have gotten negatives. Not BFNs but still, negative (they were very light, and not completely "in your face" negatives, so I wasn't to offended). I wish I knew what was up with my reproductive system... :-/

Still, I must admit, it's partly my fault. I have completely slacked on the Metformin, and need to start taking that again. I just get so afraid of it making me sick the way it used to. I HATED how it made me feel. I am not sure if we discussed any tips for taking it, i.e. taking it with a certain food, before or after meals, certain times of the day, etc. But, one thing I am proud to say is that, even though I haven't really lost any weight, my eating habits have slightly improved :) I am no longer eating fast food on a daily basis, or even various times a week like I used to. I am actually trying to eat more grilled and natural, non-fried things. The part where I am not doing so well is only eating about twice a day, but I am waking up kind of late and am just not that hungry... don't know what else to do about that. I just hope I can find a way to incorporate the Metformin into my life in a way that it won't disrupt it too much.

Well, I think that's abo

ut it for now... I don't really know what else to say, except I still think of Baby DBud every once in a while. I still think of the fact that I would've been in my 3rd tri already, preparing for Baby Showers and the Baby's room... I still think of how happy Mr. DBud and I were when we found out we were expecting. I mean, we are happy now, and we thank GOD every day for allowing us to be a part of each other's lives... and we know deep down inside that if we never had any children, we would be ok with it just being "us"... but it just sucks. It will always suck and it will never stop sucking. It is what it is. I guess, sometimes, life isn't fair. There are so many people out there who have no business having children getting pregnant everyday, and the "good" people have a hard time, never get pregnant or miscarry. I have faith that GOD has a plan for us... for all of us... I just wish I knew what that was.

So tempted...

To POAS!!!!! I am 21 days late, so of course that sparks a temptation to pee on stuff... I have been feeling slight cramps, and have been slightly constipated, but that's about it. I need answers!!!

So, as of now there's not much else to report. I hope to have good news soon about moving on with my TTC journey...



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Ridiculous...

I am officially 18 days late... Maybe AF went on vacation, or something, but I wish she would've let me know :-/

If she doesn't arrive in the next week or so, I am going to make an appointment with my OB/GYN. I've just about had enough.




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3 BFNs and NO sign of AF

photo credit

This has got to be one of the WORST feelings ever!!! I am officially 11 days late, and there's still no sign of AF or a BFP. I think it's pretty safe to say a BFP is a bust at this point... I have tested a total of 3 times in the past 11 days. I have been having some mild cramps, almost like a tightness, in my lower abdomen area. I was hoping I would have an answer as to what is going on, but still nothing. No spotting, blood or a 2nd line.

I cannot go on with my TTC life until something happens... and THAT really sucks :-/