Another one bites the dust!

I remember when my friends and I would apply that very same phrase to guys in our freshman class at college. None of us really thought that when we went to a college in NYC with a large performing arts program there would be no available guys. The year started with all these available straight men, but slowly...da, da, da, da Another one bites the dust...they all came out at started dating each other. It has been years since I have thought of this anecdote. Sadly now this phrase no longer represents all the men I can't date, but it stands for all the cycles that ended with a BFN...18 to be specific.

Even though we officially started TTC January 2009 (15 cycles ago), we did spend a little time in the limbo land of not-not trying for three cycles. Add all this together and you get 18 cycles with no BFP in sight. To say I am despondent would be an understatement. I have reached the point that I don't think I will ever see a BFP. The dream of having a biological child feels farther away than ever. In a hundred years, I NEVER thought we would be here.

We do have an appointment scheduled with our RE on the 16th to figure out what is next. I am pretty sure we are going to move on to IVF. We have insurance coverage and I don't want to waste any more time with IUIs that obviously do not work. However, I think I would like to take a few months break first, but I am sure that will change if the RE says we can start right away.

At this point I can barely think straight, so I am going to wrap it. Welcome to our new buds. I hope your BFPs come a lot quicker than mine is coming.