Where do we go from here?

Extremely emotional appointment with the RE today. He did a SHG to follow up on the HSG that I had on Monday.

He found a very large polyp almost immediately. Even my untrained eye saw it instantly. It was very clear on the screen. He said it was approximately 3cm and needs to be surgically removed.

The cysts are still there and haven't shrunk at all so he wants to have those removed as well.

My right tube is definitely blocked on the outside. Because of this, he said my risk of ectopic pregnancy rises and he recommends going straight to IVF.

Unfortunately, I don't know how we'll afford IVF.

I feel like we've reached a wall that I can't break down or go around. I left the doctor's office and sat in the car and just sobbed and sobbed. Big, loud, heaving sobs. Somehow I made it through the day at work with breaks to go in the bathroom and cry.

And as if that bad news wasn't bad enough.... I got a big box of Enfamil samples in the mail today. Grrrrr.

Being Pregnant is SCARY

I have been a really bad blogger lately. We have had a really eventful past few days so here is the Cliff notes version. Thursday night I started having some bad cramping & a little bit of spotting. Because of the miscarriages in the past I completely lost it. I called my Dr's office & they told me I could either go to the ER that night or wait and call them back in the morning. Since Mr. Faith Bud was out of town working and it was just me and little Faith Bud I opted to wait until the next day. Well I called my Dr the next morning and they were not able to get me in so they suggested I go to the ER. I headed that way and spent about 6 hours in the ER. They did another HCG quantitative where they discovered my HCG levels were 56,000. At the high range for 6 weeks pregnant, which is where we are. They wanted to do an ultrasound to make sure baby was OK as well. They also established that I was extremely dehydrated so I was lucky enough to get an IV. The ultrasound showed baby measuring right on and I was able to see our little monkey. His heart was beating at 129 bpm, which is pretty good/normal for 6 weeks. They released me with a diagnosis of Threatened Miscarriage with instructions to make an appointment with my OB/GYN ASAP for follow up. They also put me on bed rest & pelvic rest until I was released by my OB/GYN. So it's been a really emotional weekend. A lot of ups and downs but I am feeling pretty optimistic right now. I haven't had any spotting since Friday which is a great thing. With our previous m/c's the bleeding only got worse. My m/s also returned this morning. I have been trying to take it easy and drink a lot of water. We are praying that tomorrow the baby is still thriving and growing! We are trusting God to keep our little monkey safe and healthy.

The journey of faith

Hi all! My name is Faith Bud. For me there is a great source of meaning behind that name. Here is my story.

Mr. Faith Bud and I initially decided to start TTC when we were very early in our relationship. I already have a little Faith Bud from a previous relationship that Mr. Faith Bud will be adopting in the very near future.



The females on my moms side of the family have all been diagnosed with Ovarian, Uterine & Cervical Cancer by the age of 25. Prior to TTC I saw my OB/GYN every 6 months as there is no doubt that I will actually get this type of cancer & as long as they catch it very early I have a strong chance of survival. Mr. Faith Bud and I knew very early on that we wanted to get married & have more children. I was diagnosed with cervical cancer right after Mr. Faith Bud and I first met. We started TTC in March of 2007. We conceived in October of 2007. I found out about 10 dpo (on Halloween!!!) via a blood test. This was the same day Mr. Faith Bud and I moved in together. We were so thrilled! We m/c at 6 weeks a few days before Thanksgiving. We were not able to TTC again before Mr. Faith Bud deployed December of 2007. Mr. Faith Bud came home on leave & we TTC again. We got pregnant & m/c again at about 5 weeks this time. A few months after our second m/c I had blood work done and the doctor saw I had low progesterone levels. They wanted to wait until Mr. Faith Bud to come home & for me to loose some weight before we went thru any sort of fertility drugs, treatments, etc. Mr. Faith Bud got home in February & we have been TTC since. We are currently on cycle 17 of TTC. This is our last chance before we start Clomid for 3 cycles.

We have faith that God will bless us with another baby. Even though there have been many bumps in the road it has brought us closer together.

I look forward to sharing our journey with you!