Fert Report In...

First Giving Honor to God he is Awesome...


The Embryologist and I played phone tag today. Turns out they got 20 eggs yesterday after all was said and done. 17 of those 20 eggs were mature and 14 out of the 17 fertilized with ICSI. She believes we will go to a five day transfer on Saturday but she is going to call me back Thursday with another Report!

Back from Egg Retrieval...

I was knocked out so the Dr. went and talked to Mr. Blessed Bud after the ER. They got 16 eggs. Dr. B told me the other day that he thought they would get somewhere around 20. Before they knocked me out the Embryologist told me they would call me with the Fert Report tomorrow. The Anesthesiologist, Nurse, Embryologist and the head Dr. were very nice and they surprisingly they were waiting for me when I got there and took me right back to change for the ER.

Photography Credit

After the ER Mr. Blessed Bud came into the Recovery to sit with me as well as my Step Daughter. Mr. Blessed bought me lunch and now I am at home taking it easy with some bloating and cramping that I pray will subside in a few days. Thanks for all of your Thoughts & Prayers thus far and I will be back tomorrow with God willing, what will be a great Fert Report...

Follie check #2

I went in this morning for my second follie check. Unfortunately, my RE was not in the office this morning, so the other RE from my office stood in during my u/s and one of the nurses physically did the u/s. I have had them before for some other u/s, but I like it better when my RE does it because he shows me what's going on & what he's seeing during the u/s. This RE & nurse just kinda talk to each other, but don't really tell me what they are seeing. The nurse & RE doing my /us spoke in general terms saying that my lining looked great & that I had lots of follies on each ovary...they said everything looked excellent!! I mentioned that Dr. G (my RE) said they'd measuring follies today, and the RE said that they were measuring them. She said there were several that were about 13-14mm (they were the largest) & there were lots more that were less than 11mm & some even smaller than that. The RE told me to make an appointment for Wednesday morning, but to wait on the call later today for directions.

My nurse called about an hour ago & said to stay on the same meds dosage, and to actually come in tomorrow instead of Wednesday due to more crazy snow expected in our area. My estrogen level this morning was 909 - up from 209 on Friday, which is good since my nurse said Estrogen is supposed to increase during your cycle. If all goes well, hopefully I will be triggering later this week & doing the ER this weekend sometime! Thanks for all the thoughts & prayers...I know they are working, so please keep 'em coming!!

PS - BIG GL and T&P to Blessed Bud, who's going in for her ER today!! I hope they gets lots of eggs & you have an excellent fertilization rate! Best wishes!

17 weeks & It's a BOY!

Well on Wednesday was supposed to be our 16 week check up appt. Normally the routine is pee in a cup, weight (still the same as pre-pregnancy), blood pressure (perfect), check for HB and just some questions on how I've been feeling etc. This appt. when about the same with the exception that we asked the OB when he would do an u/s. Since I left my RE @ 7.5 weeks the only u/s I'd had were the NT Scan and repeat with the perinatologist. The OB hadn't done one yet. So we asked since our insurance covers all maternity stuff 100%. He looked at my chart and said we could do one at my next appt. (20 weeks). I told him we had an u/s scheduled for 2 weeks from then, our anatomy scan. He said "oh , okay, do you want to do it today?" so of course I squealed YES!
He filled out his form and then sent me across the hall to their other office where they do the scans.
So I got on the table and the tech started checking around. The first thing we got was Baby LB's HB which was 146bpm, then we saw his hand up and saying "hello!", then as she moved around and before she even asked if we wanted to know the sex I already knew what it was :) I said "well, that looks like HIS penis so I'm guessing it's a BOY?"
She said yes and I just started laughing...hysterically. Not the reaction I had planned on having but it's what happened lol. I've been calling Baby LB a "he" since the day I found out I was pregnant. I've always just had this feeling. The funny comes from the fact that I'm usually NEVER right about guessing genders. DH was beyond thrilled, he got very emotional and could no stop grinning from ear to ear all day. The rest of the scan went well Baby was laying on his back so we got a nice profile shot of him. I really think he's going to end up looking like my husband which would be kinda funny since Mr. LB is an exact duplicate of his father. Baby LB has the cutest little nose! I can't stop looking at him.
After the appt. we went to lunch and bought a few items for our boy :)

Re: the pregnancy.
The last couple of weeks have been uneventful except for the baby flutters! Those have been amazing. Aside from still being tired at around 4:00pm every day, I've been feeling good. My next appt. is the 17th for the anatomy scan. My OB says everything looks great and that if everything looks good with the anatomy scan next week we should be good to go!
at our next appt. with the OB we'll have another u/s so it'll be nice to see the LO every 2 weeks.


Re: getting ready for Baby LB!
We've started the process of emptying out the office which will eventually becoming Baby LB's room. It's definitely proving to be a PITA but it's all worth it. I heard from the baby store that the crib will take about 2.5 months to arrive. So the plan is to order it by next month so it will be here some time in mid-May. The carpets in this room need to be re-don so we're hoping to have the room painted before that happens. Painting will most likely be done next month and the carpet change following that. There's a lot to do!

We're both very excited with this very big change. I still thank God everyday for the blessing of our baby. I still really can't believe that I actually get to become "Mommy". It's such a long way from the days that I truly felt it was never going to happen.

A Snowy IVF Update

Photography Credit

Let It Snow?
So this week proved to be very busy with work and constantly going to Dr. B. So, I thought nothing of it when the weatherman predicted snow this weekend. I had to go to Dr. B on Friday and turn right back around and go to him on Saturday morning smack dab in the middle of the snow. I am so thankful Mr. Blessed Bud let me use his SUV Saturday. Here is a re-cap of my IVF progress this week:


2/3/10 ...............
Had b/w and u/s this afternoon. I now have 15 follies on both ovaries today they were 12mm up from 11mm on Monday. I am on day 9 of stims. Dr. B told me I should be 1 or 2 mm's ahead but that PCOS girls sometimes get resistant so he upped my dose of Menopur for tonight. He did not want to up me too much he wants to go slow because he said he doesn't want a big BOOM of follies all of a sudden. I go back Friday and my ER will be early next week instead of this weekend. Praying that my follies continue to grow...

2/5/10 ...............
Night 11 of stims and I had b/w and u/s with Dr. B this afternoon. My E2 levels are rising nicely. I have a lot of follies many mature, some immature so I do my last dose of stims tonight (225iu Follistim, 2 vials of Menopur) and it is back to Dr. B tomorrow morning for another u/s. He is trying to get the immature follicles to catch up to the ones that are ready for trigger. Dr. B is most likely going to trigger me tomorrow evening for ER on Monday!

2/6/10 ...............
Last u/s and b/w with Dr. B. was Saturday morning. I was given instructions to Trigger at 1:30 am on Sunday and my ER is on Monday!

2/7/10 ...............
I Triggered at 1:30 am and hit the hay so I could get some sleep for church. I was instructed by Dr. B and Nurse S to take an OPK at 12 noon and call them with the results. At church I used the bathroom before my bishop's sermon, got 2 lines and left a message with my RE's answering service. My RE called me back after church and explained to me that he wanted to make sure I got my LH surge.

On Sundays we do a prayer in the online community I am part of on the bump/nest. Here is my prayer and I will have an update after my ER tomorrow...

Dear Heavenly Father,

Please continue to allow me to walk by FAITH and not by SIGHT. Please give me the strength to continue on in the midst of the storm. Please bless my Husband and give him peace and comfort as we go to our ER tomorrow. Please touch the Dr's, Embryologist and Nurses. Lord I thank you for sending me to my RE and allowing him to be the vessel in which your perfect will be done. I ask your blessings upon my Step Daughter as she journeys with us tomorrow and I pray that you remove all fear and doubt from my mind as I continue on this IVF journey. Bless my angel baby in heaven and my unborn children, whom I will raise to your honor and your glory. Father please bless all of my sisters in IF and help them to keep on keeping on.

In Jesus Precious Name,

Amen

A whole other group of people who will never understand

All along while going through the torture that is infertility and IVF, I have thought that no matter what, there was one group of people who "got it". Other girls who have done IVF. That was a no brainer. Now I know that's not necessarily true.

My husband and I went to a counselor this week. She was great and we really liked her. We got her name from our RE, because she specializes in infertility. What I didn't realize was that she specializes in it, because she lived it. She did 9 IVFs. She has 1 biological child and 2 adopted. It was sitting in her office that I realized for the first time that I was normal. I felt normal. She got me. Completely. Every emotion.

Feeling normal was so nice.

I have 2 girls at work that I talk to who have done IVF. One of them goes to our RE, and they're both dealing with MFI also. They've always been such a support, but over the past few days, it's become obvious that they just don't get it.

The one that goes to my RE has done IVF 2 times and it's worked both times. She has 4 children (one older daughter from a previous relationship, 3 year old twins and a baby). The other is 23 weeks pregnant with twins from her first IVF. They just can't understand the disappointment of it NOT working, and furthermore, finding out something else is wrong.

I found that out when they both told me this week to relax and it would happen.

I can't believe someone who went through IVF just told me to relax and it would happen.

We're going to go back to the counselor. I really liked feeling normal - and NOT being told to relax. It's nice to have someone in my life - even if i'm paying her - who understands how much this sucks from firsthand experience.

Do DHs ever really "get it"?

Photo credit

"When are you going to be pregnant already?"

"What are we doing wrong?"

This is his refrain during the 2ww and waiting-to-O times.

"I'm too tired"

"I can't perform on demand"

"BDing on a schedule is NO FUN"

This is his refrain during my fertile time.

Tonight we spent the evening with my 13 month old nephew. We are both head over heels into baby fever full speed. But sometimes I feel like DH just doesn't get it.

Yes, sex on a schedule is less fun than spontaneous sex.

BUT (and this is a big "but" here):

Having sex at the right time is PARAMOUNT when TTCing.

He doesn't want to look at my chart. He doesn't want to know when I'm fertile. He's afraid it'll diminish his ability to perform. But what it's doing - in effect - is diminishing our ability to effectively conceive a baby!

I thought that spending the evening with a little one would spark some romantic feelings and give us some non-fertile sexy-time. But instead, he's frustrated that I'm not PG, and I'm frustrated that he just doesn't get it.

I'm at a loss right now. Thankfully, I'm deep into my 2ww and honestly, I don't need him, at least not at this moment. Whatever is done is done - there's either a little zygote waiting to implant and blossom, or... there isn't.

I just don't know how many cycles it'll take before he gets it:

Making babies TAKES WORK.

Having GREAT friends helps + follie check #1!

I had my first follie monitoring appointment this morning, but before I talk about that, can I just AW my dear dear Bud friends for a minute?! Chef Bud & Obsessive Bud. They are literally so.freakin.awesome. And let me tell you why....

First, Chef Bud - she is such a wonderful, sweet person. We met online on one of our favorite TTC message boards back in late June when Mr. Worry Bud & I started TTC. We have been there to root each other on through failed cycle, after failed cycle, but have both tried to remain positive & hopeful! Since we both started seeing RE's for our TTC issues around the same time, we kept in touch via email to support each other. I checked our mail this morning (forgot to last night...had to run to the grocery store to get some essentials before the crazy winter storm expected to hit our area in a few hours) & look what I got:

Lucky penguin Valentines socks, a very sweet card & a rose quartz heart shaped stone. The note with the rose quartz says "RQ represents love & fertility. It is said to help promote pregnancy & to protect the mother & unborn fetus from miscarriage."

Well, I sent a personal note to CB, but I just want to say publicly that you have no clue how much this gesture means to me. It brought tears to my eyes that someone I have never met IRL cares that much about me to put together something so special & send it to me. It makes me feel so good to know that I have such wonderful people out there thinking of me. My rose quartz heart & penguin socks will definitely be accompanying me to my monitoring & other appts. & procedures! Thank you again & again & again Chef Bud - you are truly a wonderful person, friend & are going to make a wonderful mother. I love you girl!

And then, there's Obessive Bud. She is an awesome friend & shortly after she joined the blog, we became close friends that talk pretty much everyday via text, phone or G-Chat. She has been so positive & has been a wonderful support system for me - cheering me on as I go! I just want to say thank you to you as well OB for always being there & for calming me down when I start freaking & WORRYing about everything I have going on. I love you too & you are an awesome friend. I can't wait to "meet" that precious LO you have growing big & strong inside you. I know that you will be an awesome momma!

And while I'm at it...to all the other Buds, followers, friends that have been thinking of us during our IVF cycle & have commented on my posts, leaving us well wishes & hope & prayers & love...I also want to say, again, to each of you: THANK YOU! It truly warms my heart to know how many other women out there care about my story & are thinking of me. Mr. WB & I want to express how much it means to us, but I honestly don't think I can put how much your support means into words. It has helped me to remain positive, upbeat & hopeful about this cycle! I consider each of you my virtual friends & just want you to know that I think about & pray for each you every day & night as well!

***********************

Okay, sorry for the long prelude to this post, but I felt like I needed to express how much everyone's support has meant & continues to mean to me everyday! So, IDK how many of you live on the east coast, but we are expecting a huge winter storm today - many meteorologists are predicting that this could be one of the worst we have had in nearly 10 years! I mean the one in December dropped almost 2 feet of snow & this is supposed to be worse...eeek! Both that December storm & this one are predicted to be in the top 10 worse winter storms for this area! This photo shows the snow on my back deck form December - it was a lot!

Anyways, I say all this to describe my RE office visit this morning. I went in for my first follie monitoring appointment this morning & it was PACKED at my RE's office. I found out that they moved all of their Saturday monitoring appointments to this morning to avoid the craziness that is sure to take over my area in just a few short hours. Despite the office being a bit more packed than usual, I still got in & out in about 30 min. I got my blood drawn (only 1 vial again!), then emptied my bladder & walked back to the ultrasound waiting area. Once I was called in, my RE checked out my lining & ovaries with the "vag cam". He said my lining was getting thicker, just like it should & then he checked out both ovaries after 3 days of stimming with Gonal-F & Menopur. On my left ovary, he said he observed "12 less than 10mm" & on the right I have "10 less than 10mm". He said I appear to be right on track & that after they get my blood results back, then my nurse will give me call with directions on either adjusting or keeping my meds dosages the same. I asked if it started getting bad outside would they possibly not call with directions & they said they'd make every single call before leaving for the night! I love my RE's office staff - everyone is so nice from the financial coordinator - to the girl who draws blood - to all the nurses - and especially my RE. He's a great man & I have have such respect for him & confidence in him that he is doing anything he can to help us get pregnant. It definitely helps me stay positive when I feel so confident in the staff working with us!

While waiting to be called in for my u/s, I got a chance to chat with several other women cycling right now, one was doing an IUI, a couple doing frozen cycles, and one other doing fresh. It always makes me feel better to talk with someone else in a similar situation, or who has gone through the same thing I am going through now. We talked about how everything was going so far. I asked them if any of them were using Menopur & a couple had - we talked about how much that shot stings! It's hard to describe, but the best thing I can think of is that it feels kind of like fire being shot inside of you. Nothing I can't handle, but it definitely doesn't feel that great! So far, that has been the most difficult shot for me. Despite that, I am still remaining positive & hopeful and feeling pretty good so far! I do feel a bit uncomfortable in my ovaries b/c they are getting bigger with all the follies, but that was something I expected to feel, so again, nothing I can't handle! So, that's my update - sorry for such a LONG post, but I had so much to say! Thanks as always for continuing to pray for & think of us...I think about all of you everyday too!

And if you are in the storm area, stay safe this weekend! It just started coming down here!

32 Weeks and an OVERLOAD of info...

I had my 32 week appointment with Dr. C yesterday. It went pretty well - minus the fact that my back has still been killing me and she keeps giving me all these "suggestions" when all I really want is a referral to a massage therapist who specializes in pre-natal massages. Don't get me wrong... Mr GB does a good job... but I can only imagine the real thing.

Anyway, I got to do the usual... pee in a cup - check... blood pressure - normal... Baby GB's heart beat - 150 and he kicked the doppler yet again... tape measure to the belly - right on track (wohoo - not big!!!)... then she started in on the Gestational Diabetes talk. First of all she apologized to me because as I distinctly remember she said I was one of her patients that she believed would "have nothing to worry about." Yeah right... it was nice she remembered saying that though. Apparently, as noted before my number for the 1 hour test was only slightly elevated and come to find out technically I didn't even fail the 3 hour!!! She showed me my numbers and if you recall from this post to really fail the 3 hour you are to fail 2 or more of the 4 blood draws... I failed one... but another of my numbers was 1 point (1 POINT!!!!) below the cut-off so she decided to cautiously diagnose me with gestational diabetes.

Honestly, I'm fine with it - if any of you have talked to me in the last few weeks since dealing with the GD Dx you know that I feel better than ever. I have a ton more energy, I've actually lost a few pounds, and I'm really considering continuing this diet plan (although a not so strict version) after Baby GB is born. Who woulda thunk??? :)

She did give me some more information as far as being induced early. The nutritionist had mentioned that a lot of doctors don't let patients with GD go past 38 weeks so I definitely wanted to ask her about this. Dr. C says that the EARLIEST she'd induce me is 39 weeks and that's ONLY if Baby GB starts to grow out of control. With my body frame, height and weight... she said there's probably no way a baby larger than about 9 lbs is coming out of... well... there. So there'd be a higher chance of C-section if she let me go. Also, she said that she won't let me go past my due date. So... March 29th it is :) If he's not here on his own by the time I hit my 40 week appointment, I'll be going sometime that week for induction. EEK!!! Scary! But oh so exciting!!! :)

Also (I swear I'm almost done!), starting at week 34 I have to go in for two (count them... two) weekly appointments at the hospital for non-stress tests. This is ALONG with my regular appointments - which are now every 2 weeks and at 36 weeks every week - with Dr. C. I'm not 100% sure exactly what these NST's entail but she said one is some kind of test to measure his movement (while simulating a contraction?!) and another test will be an ultrasound to measure the fluid levels. Apparently another side effect of GD is that the fluid around little Baby GB could get low if my blood sugars are not controlled which could either mean: 1. bedrest or 2. early induction. So while it's kind of cool I get to see him on the big screen on a weekly basis - what a pain!!! I've asked my work if I can switch my schedule from 8am-5pm to 7am-4pm so at least I won't have to take time off, I'll just head over to the hospital and hope that they can fit me in before 5. Fingers crossed...


Here's what Baby GP is up to this week:
Baby's now the size of a squash! Ready or not, baby's getting ready to emerge. She's probably in the head-down position by now, with her bottom facing up. This is the comfiest way for her body to fit in your increasingly cramped womb and will make her eventual exit (only a few months away now!) much easier. (If she's still head-up, don't panic -- there's still time for a flip before birth.)

Anyone Else?

Is anyone else out there in the TTC land, no matter what point your at, obsessed with Fertility Friend or charting in general? I swear sometimes I just stare at my chart hoping it will magically tell me GO BD RIGHT NOW AND YOU'LL GET KNOCKED UP!!!

I've only been charting for two cycles now, and I am not an expert, but there seems to be absolutely zero consistency in my charts. Though, I don't really even know if there should be consistency. I'm clueless (well... somewhat).

At this point, I just so desperately want to be pg by the time our Due Date arrives from Angel MB. I have a slight feeling that this won't happen but Mr MB keeps asking me to be hopeful. Sometimes the only thing that reminds me of any sort of hope is my password to my computer at work. It has Hope in it.

I really hope that we don't have to go another cycle TTCing, but if we do, Mr MB will be taking 1000mg of Vitamin C each morning and I'll start myself on some Pom juice. I also have a connection to six free sessions of acupuncture. I don't want to be that woman who puts all her eggs in one basket, but this is getting a little ridiculous. It'll be six months this month since our loss. I want a baby dang it!!

"Patience Grasshopper......."