2WW Blood Work & Random Thoughts

I think every time I call the Dr. with a question regarding my medication/treatment he has me come in for blood work. Not that I mind getting more information about my hormone levels so I will have peace of mind through this LOOOONNNNNGGG wait!! My question was about taking Estrace so late because in my previous two cycles I had started taking it before the transfer and this time I was going to start it 6 days after the transfer. So he had me come in to check my Estridol and Progesterone levels.
In I went to have my blood drawn,I got one of the good blood drawing nurses, and was told that they had just got two positive pregnancy tests that day from difficult IVF cycles. That helped me feel more confident that things will end up differently this time around. She was saying that she had read that laughter helped you to conceive, I have been doing a lot of that by keeping myself busy with friends and family. I actaully have a long list of things I do "just in case" they make this one stick:
- lay/sleep only on my back & slightly elevated upper body
- smell my husband to get lots of Pheromones
- laugh
- No heavy lifting
- Limited bending over
- Walk slowly
- No bouncing
- Keep distracted
Pretty much if someone gives me a "theory" I do it "just in case".

Back to my blood work. The nurse called back and said to that my Estridol levels were low at 34 and my Progesterone levels were great at 33.92. I was told I needed to start taking 4mg of Estrace instead of 2 mg and to start immediately. I am hoping that this has not affected the implantation or upcoming implantation of these embryos. I got varying information of the internet on what were normal levels and it doesn't seem that it is too far off for someone not on Estrogen supplementation. I am going with everything will be fine.

Twinges

All day I have been feeling what you might describe as "twinges" or a "pinching" feeling on my left side. I am going to go with that it is those little embryos implanting, if not whatever it is just better knock it off!!

2 WW in Progress

I am three days into my 2 WW, and yes it is still as nerve racking as the other two IVF cycles. I have been trying to stay off the IVF chat groups and reading peoples worries because of course they become mine!! I did do a little research about 10 and 12 cell embryos and if that meant they were stronger than the normal 8 cell day 3 embryos. The 12 cell embryo is called a morula, the stage right before blastocyte, and the 10 cell embryo is an intermediate growing embryo. Both of these have higher implantation rates and are supposed to be, statistically, stronger embryos than the 8 cell. I will take that as this time is the lucky round of IVF!!

I have been laying around, flat on my back with my head raised higher than my feet so those embryos stay low in my uterus. I know they say once they are in there isn't much you can do except wait and pray that it will be successful. I am a bit paranoid that my one tube will suck those embryos right out of my uterus thinking they are foreign objects instead of expensive babies that I desperately want to stay put!! I have been minimizing the amount of time I am standing or sitting to make sure my uterus is calm and relaxed as well. Keeping my fingers and toes crossed that these little embryos are growing and thriving in my uterus!!

Embryo Transfer

They are in!!! It was a bit different this time around in seeing the embryos than in Panama. The microscope is in this NICU looking bed so we could walk into the same room and actually look into the microscope to look at each one. There were 4 that were looking the most promising so we only looked at those since really there are 14 to look at. The embryologist had a sheet that has been tracking each embryo from fertilization that showed us how they have grown and changed each day, that was pretty cool to see. Of the 4 we had 2 A and 2 B grade embryos to choose from. The first A was a 12 cell with less than 5% fragmentation, the second A was a 10 cell with less than 5% fragmentation, the first B was a 6+2 (6 even sized cells + 2 smaller uneven sized cells) cell with less than 5% fragmentation and the second B was 4+4 cell with 15% fragmentation. It was pretty cool how the embryologist knew which embryo was where on the petri dish and I like how well he explained the qualities of each one to Mr. Explorer Bud and I. He showed us our name that was written on the petri dish and then each dot of liquid to the right of our name going clockwise was a different embryo. The other 10 embryos were varying degrees of B's and C's but were uneven cell sizes and/or fragmented. The embryologist said there is about a 10% chance the other 10 will freeze and if they have a fragmentation over 45% they will not freeze them. We find out in 2 days if any will freeze.
Getting back to the embryo transfer, talking with the Dr. and embryologist they suggested I put back the 2 A's and one of the B grade embryos due to my age, PCOS, Hypothyroidism, tubal pregnancy and past failures in IVF. I agreed and so we then got to pick between the two B's. Funny that we are choosing which embryo we will put back??!! That is IVF for you so weird but cool at the same time!! I was talking with some friends the other night and we were laughing because I know the exact process of how the female body produces follicles, eggs, ovulates, travels, fertilizes and attaches. I apparently went to reproductive school by being infertile, an expensive education!!
With the help of the embryologist we chose the 4+4 B grade embryo because it was a more evenly dividing embryo even though it had a higher fragmentation. The transfer itself went smoothly, the nurse commented that my lining was looking good since she could see it on the ultrasound clearly and the whole process was smooth and painless. I was worried that there would be some discomfort with my cervix but there was none. I get to be on bed rest for the next two days and modified bed rest the next two days, then ease into normal activity. I am feeling good about this transfer and the embryos we chose so I am feeling hopeful at this point.

Embryo Update

Mr. Explorer Bud once again got the phone call for the embryo update!! So I had to call to get more clarification on the report. We have 4 good embryos and 10 that have a lot of fragmentation and aren't growing as well. When I spoke with the Dr. he said that they will keep watching the 10 and if they make it to blastocyte stage they will freeze them and it means they are hearty embryos. Great that we have 4 good ones and a bit bummed that 10 are not doing well. I think you always want them all to be great and grow but I need to just remember the positive aspects of this cycle. Also, we may change the transfer day to this afternoon but we will have to wait and see how the embryos are growing.

Egg Retrieval

Yesterday was the Egg Retrieval at 8am. I was glad our time got moved up on Tuesday so I didn't have to wait around for the procedure. Mr. Explorer Bud got up and got to work with his sperm sample while I got ready for the procedure and took care of the dog. We hopped in the car right on time and zipped down to the Dr.'s office. The Dr. did an ultrasound to make sure that I hadn't ovulated yet and that everything looked good for the procedure. Then my nurse came in and took my vitals and asked me a bunch of questions about what I am allergic to and other health issues that may pose a problem being put under. I was then taken to the back room which was way more high tech looking than in Panama. In Panama it was the anesthesiologist, the Dr. and the Embryologist on a normal looking exam table. Here it was a bit intimidating the huge leg stirrups and arm pads where they tied my arms to (after I was out cold). I had my own nurse, the Dr., the Dr.'s nurse, the anesthesiologist and the embryologist.

I don't even remember getting the medicine to knock me out in the IV I just remember laying there and then waking up in the next room. So weird but I am very glad I get knocked out for the procedure. I have read that some Dr.'s don't put you under and how very uncomfortable it is, which with how sore my ovaries are right now it would be unpleasant!

We were able to get 15 eggs retrieved, 15!! Everyone was really surprised that there were that many in there. So we get to wait and see how many will fertilize and when our transfer date is.

I feel soo blessed that this cycle went from thinking about cancelling it due to poor response to 15 eggs retrieved. There has been some definite miracles and blessings here throughout this cycle. I am also amazed at the technology that we have to be able to conceive a child when otherwise there would be very little chance of us having a child of our own without adoption.

Retrieval is Scheduled

Today we had our 4th IVF appointment with the Dr. The eggs are looking great, we have one 18 mmm, 3-4 17 mm, 1 16 mm and 4 15 mm eggs. I took a shot of Lupron tonight at 8:30 and we will do the transfer 8:00 am Tuesday morning. I will POAS tomorrow morning to make sure that I have enough HCG in my system and if not I will need to take more HCG to make sure they can get the eggs on Tuesday.
I am feeling really excited because things are progressing and feeling like they are back on track. My lining is continuing to look great and the eggs are growing good so I feel positive about this cycle. I wonder if my body will do better because the cycle is longer, more like my natural cycle is. I have never had a 28 day cycle so maybe when doing IVF forcing my cycle to fit into that 28 days wasn't working for it. Who really knows but that is the only thing different this third time around, so I am hoping that will be a positive. Oh and tomorrow is my one day of no shots!! Tuesday I start up with the Progesterone shots which I am not looking forward to but I will just focus on the one day of no shots!!

Good News

Photo Credit

Today's appointment was a success!! The increase in Menopur worked and we have 6 good sized eggs that are large enough to be good candidates to retrieve. We have (1) 12, (2) 11, (2) 10 and (1) 9. To be ready to harvest they will need to be between 16 - 20 mm in diameter and they grow at about 1-2 mm per day. So if we do the retrieval Monday almost all the larger sized eggs will be good to take and fertilize. Let's just say I did a little dance once the Dr. left the room I was soo excited that we weren't going to have to cancel this cycle and start over. Mr. Explorer Bud is the Optimist of the partnership and he was full of "I told you so's" which I am perfectly fine with that he was right and I was being the Debbie Downer. Better than me being right!! So I will continue to take three vials of Menopur along with a shot of Repronex to keep me from ovulating, till Saturday morning when I have another ultrasound to see how they are developing and when we will have the retrieval.

Thank you for all your positive vibes, prayers and crossed limbs, I know it all was helpful!!

1st IVF Appointment

Today was our first appointment for the start of the IVF process. We did our baseline ultrasound and there were some follicles hanging out in the ovaries and no cysts. So off to a decent start. We did have to dialate my cervix which was quite the unpleasant experience. I am not sure why I didn't have to have that done the first two times but man am I glad I didn't. I wanted to throw up and pass out while trying to relax my uterus so my cervix would keep expanding. Next time I will drug myself heavily!!!

We went over the medication schedule, set up our second appointment for the 29th, got our needles and syringes and got my hip/butt marked for the Menopur injections. The Dr. said he felt they were absorbed better intramuscular instead of subcutaneous in the abdomen so sadly I will be getting more butt shots than I had hoped for but the Dr. did say they are supposed to hurt less that way as well. Can I really trust him to know that info??!!

I start Clomid and Femara tomorrow and then Menopur on Thanksgiving! I will be in rainy California for the rest of this week visiting with family so that will be good but a new twist of going through an IVF cycle doing normal life stuff.

Oh and we got to pay for the procedure, dilation and needles to a nice total of $4,710. So far with our medication costing $1,093 (I still need to purchase HCG shot and the Progesterone shots), the mini-stem IVF w/ ICSI $4,600 and cervix dilation $100 we are at $5,793. Not too bad, we will still need to pay $500 for the anesthesiologist, and the last two ultrasounds are $500 and any blood work so it will be interesting to see the grand total compared to Panama.

Dr. Appointment - Check!!

Yesterday we finally made it to the new Dr.'s office after cancelling and debating on when we should reschedule. Mr. Explorer Bud and I both agree that we liked this Dr. and he had some interesting theories about PCOS and Hypothyroidism.We first got to fill out more paperwork and then go back with a nurse and have her fill some more in on the computer and then sat around waiting to go talk with the Dr. He went over both our previous lab work, IVF treatments and surgeries which brought up a little emotion when talking about the IVF cycles. I was surprised because I felt almost defensive about them that I produced good eggs and everything was fine. Strange but so is going through infertility too!

In talking about how I was feeling, tired, colder than other people around me and still not dropping weight like I feel I should be he felt my T3 levels were not up to par so he has put me on a natural Thyroid that is T3 and T4 and we will retest my levels in 6 weeks so I am hoping to feel more energized. Then we moved over to PCOS where he talked about Testosterone and that a lot of the time women with PCOS are actually lacking Free Testosterone but not in Total Testosterone. When you are lacking in Free Testosterone you are tired, have trouble remembering things, poor muscle development, low sex-drive and lots more symptoms. I have a lot of these symptoms and my Total Testosterone isn't terribly high but it is a little high but interestingly I wasn't tested for Free Testosterone levels. If we are going to do IVF within the next 6 months then I will have to wait to address this issue because to treat it I would be put on too high of levels of Testosterone to carry a baby. At least I know what some of my problems may be stemming from.

So any who, moving onto the exam portion of the appointment, which I appreciate since it is coming out of my pocket I would like the Dr. to actually see what is going on in those ovaries and uterus before he makes recommendations. He did confirm that I am Poly Cystic, on my right ovary I had about 20 follicles and on my left I had a few. He then said that my cervix was very tight and only had a pin hole size opening when it should be bigger and that he will probably need to dilate my cervix for our next IVF. Has anyone had this done before and I thought it was strange since I don't believe my prior Dr. did it for either of my IVF's??

He asked if I was ever diagnosed with Endometriosis and I said no that I hadn't. He did some palpation's and found that I do on my left side which is the side that I had the ectopic and tubal removal. He said it was minor and shouldn't cause a problem but that we should keep an eye on it in the future. Yeah, one more "problem" to add to the list!! Love it!! So I am supposed to send him the pictures from my tubal ligation so he can see if it was there prior.

He did say that I probably had an infection in that tube and that was probably why I ended up with an Ectopic pregnancy which makes a little more sense than it just floated around and landed there in the tube.

At the end we decided we would move forward with a third IVF with ICSI but it will be a low stim IVF which is where I will be on Clomid for 5-7 days and then injections the last week instead of the whole time. His goal is to harvest 4-8 eggs instead of a bunch and to get at least 2 good quality ones to put back in. Since my lining is thin right now and who knows when I may ovulate next, doesn't look like anytime soon, I can start BCP's at anytime! Oh and I talked to him about my worry that my lining isn't thickening up after the IVF he said we could try taking Progesterone the last two weeks that I am on BCP's and that should help tell my body to start building up a lining.

I think I will wait a few weeks before starting the BCP since I calculated it out and I would be doing the retrieval and transfer the week of Thanksgiving which we will hopefully be in California with family. I am excited by apprehensive since the first two ended in no baby.

Embies on board!

As I mentioned in my last post, I had my ER on Sunday. It wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. We did however get some bad news right before I went into surgery; Mr. Plannerbud's sample was low (just about 3 million) that we had to do ICSI, which our insurance may not cover. We had to decide whether we would take the chance and possibly have to pay $2500. It was a big decision to make when I was already nervous, but we decided to go with it since it meant a 75% of fertilization. That decision made, I went into surgery. They were able to get 12 eggs! We were so excited.

The next day or so I was uncomfortable, but Mr. Plannerbud was amazing. He waited on me all week and helped to make me as comfortable as possible. All of this was made even better by our fert report: 7 out of the 12 fertilized. We were very excited, and so were my parents. My dad kept telling me that he hoped the "kids were playing good in nursery". It is so great that are on board with all of this.

Three days later, on Wednesday, I went in for the transfer. I pulled out all the stops and had pre- and post-transfer acupuncture at the clinic. Mr. Plannerbud and I are hoping this will be our one and only IVF, so we are doing everything we can. After my first session, the doctor transferred two embryos; one was 10 cells, one was 8, both were considered high implantation potential and had no fragmentation. The nurse who was working with me was hilarious and had me almost in tears during the whole process.

We are now in the waiting process. I go in for my beta on May 15th. Mr. Plannerbud and I are going back and forth on whether to test before it or not. Hopefully my next post will my BFP!

As a parting gift, a picture of my possible future children:

One Day to Go

I test TOMORROW!!! I am feeling eerily calm so I am not sure that is because I feel like it will be negative and it is the calm before th storm or if I am just feeling peacefully confident! I know you would think I would know what this calm is but I don't!! I feel like I don't have any symptoms except for those twings or cramps almost daily. I know there are not supposed to be symptoms right now anyways except those caused by all the hormones that I am taking but I want there to be so I can be sure that this time it is the time!! Last time I was pregnant just in the wrong place, the fallopian tube, so it's not like I can't get pregnant thru IVF but each time is different and just because it worked last time doesn't mean it will again. I guess I am resigned because this will be our last try for at least another year since we will need to save back up the money again!! Yeah I love saving money, not!!

5 Days Post Transfer

It is day five of the 2WW. Today is the last day that the embryo's should be hatching and starting to implant. By Tuesday they are supposed to be completely implanted and growing so hopefully at least one of those four are doing what they are supposed to!! I have felt some pinching feelings the past few days but I am not sure if it is the upset stomach from Metformin or implantation twinges. Hard to say unless I can look inside and see what is going on in there!! This is what a six day old embryo implanting looks like, weird huh?!


Photo Credit



Today was the Progesterone shot in the left cheek which is the most sensitive and I did a lot of walking, squatting, leg swings and this time there is not a big knot and hopefully no bruise either!! Tomorrow we fly back to the States!! YEAH!!

My Butt Is Bruised and Other Ramblings

I only have to do the Progesterone shots every other day but man is my butt sore!! The first two weren't bad going in but yesterday's was painful going in and I had a big knot for a few hours!! I was checking out my buns this mnorning in the mirror and I have several bruises sprouting up, hopefully this will end in a pregnancy so that I can feel like this was all worth it!!

Being on bed rest is soo boring!! The days drag and I am waking up about 5:30 each morning and not going to bed till 11:00 pm. Sleeping on my back is for the birds but so is laying around the apartment. My mom and I did go and get a snow cone today which was delicious. It had lots of sugary goodness that made my day!! The good thing about staying in Panama till Monday is that I will only have to wait 5 days for the blood test. Being here still doesn't feel like I am done with the IVF yet but just waiting for another appointment.

So far on this trip we have run into 4 people that are from Utah as well and we have had a wonderful time chatting in English with them. It is really nice being able to talk to someone in your own language when you are in a foreign country!! They of course ask why we are here and most of the time when people ask I will tell them why I am here but other times I just say for vacation. I am not sure why I just don't tell everyone but sometimes I don't feel like explaining everything or I figure they won't be all that interested. I guess I am still a bit self-conscious about people's opinions on what we are doing and don't want their pity either. I am fairly private with my problems and don't deal with with people's sympathies but I have been trying to work on that since I think it helps me deal with the process and my emotions. Mr. Explorer Bud likes to joke that he shows emotion like a girl and I like a guy! It is true but since being married to him I have slowly been opening up and learning how to handle the expression of emotion. Don't get me wrong I still will rarely cry in front of someone or express my emotions with people unless pried to do so but I am way better!! The one thing that makes me want to share my experience is that I have heard lots of positive stories from people of someone they know who was successful and it makes me feel positive about our cycle or when I am able to help someone else out with more information about the IVF process or where to get information. It is always amazing how many people who are in the same or similar situations as we are and it makes me feel less broken and frustrated. At least I am not the only one in this lovely boat!!

Embryo's On Board

My mom and I drove all the way to the Dr.'s office all by ourselves!! We were really nervous since this was only the second time to do it and the first without following someone. There is a huge three lane round-a-bout that we have to drive around which in Utah not that difficult in Panama a whole different story. We did it though and got a parking spot near the office and even got there early. We did get a delicious snow cone before heading out so I think the sugar eased the jitters and helped us get there!!



After consulting with Mr. Explorer Bud, my mom, the Dr., God, a few friends, and of course the internet I decided to go with 4 embryo's to implant. It is fun to get dressed into the surgical outfit then get taken to the dark room to view those little embryo's. It is like my own personal science experiment!! The four are all grade one and 8 cell so hopefully at least one of them takes. Then we get to head back to the "Operating Room" to do the Transfer. Of course I just have the little paper gown that opens in the front so pretty much you are spread eagle with the gown wide open. At least I am not embarrassed about my naked self otherwise it would make for a very uncomfortable procedure. I have the Dr., the scientist, my mom and the nurse all getting a good look at those nether regions!! This time I learned that I don't need to drink very much water for my bladder to be full, last time they said to drink 6 to 8 glasses of water so I did and had to let out my bladder several times because I was very uncomfortable! But the procedure itself isn't uncomfortable and is only about 15 minutes long. Then I get to lay on the table and chill out for a while which is nice.

I am supposed to be only sitting or laying on my back, walking no more than a mile per day, no hanging out in the sun, no activities that will make me sweat and don't get stressed. All easily done but it does make the 2WW a really long time since I am not doing much except work and home!

Fertilization Report

The results are in: of the 12 eggs, 10 fertilized with ICSI, 8 made it to day 2 and we will be transferring tomorrow around 2:30 in the afternoon. I am glad that we have 8 to choose from and we will decide how many to put in this time around. Last time we did 3 and one took but the Dr. suggested 4 this time but I am not sure. We will see tomorrow when we see the quality on day 3 of them.

We Have Arrived

My mom and I are finally here in Panama!! This time around I was mostly packed a week ahead of time, met with my doctors and purchased a panama map for my GPS system to hopefully minimize my time getting lost!! Our flight was soo much nicer this time around as we flew business class and the food was 10x's better tasting and the seats were wide and comfy to sleep on which helped get some sleep as we flew the red eye. We arrived at 10:30 in the morning and Eric, our Medical Tourism contact, met us at the airport to take us to my first appointment. It was a good feeling to know that someone was waiting and things are taken care of and I can just relax and enjoy the journey. Last time there were so many unknowns, including if the medical tourism company was a scam or real! I remember flying into Panama City and saying to my Mom, "so do you think someone will really be there to pick us up?"

Our first appointment went smoothly, we met with Dr. Berbey's assistant and he did the initial ultrasound, we went over the surgery and what happened, my medicine schedule and our next appointments. It is a nice feeling to know what is going to happen, how to do my injections, what will happen at each appointment, and a past round to compare to.


This round I am on 3 amps of Menopur (10 days), 3 tablets of Clomid (3 days) and 1 amp Cetrotide (4 days). My first injection stung but I know that it will get better and then get more irritated towards the end of the two weeks but hopefully it will be all worth it!


We are are currently wrapped in our cozy robes and tucked into bed watching Biggest Loser definitely a good motivational show to be watching so I think I will have to take those people's dedication and hard work and transfer it to my IVF cycle!!

Introducing Explorer Bud

Let’s start at the beginning, girl meets boy, they fall in love and get married! I married Mr. Explorer Bud in June 2007 and we bought our first home a week after getting married! We knew we didn’t want kids right away as Mr. Explorer Bud still had 3+ years of school left and I was working full time. So we started our marriage off with lots of traveling and fun adventures instead. I love to try new things and have picked up sewing, knitting, baking, cooking, swimming, running races, a triathlon, CrossFit, working at a crisis nursery, rock climbing, tennis, bicycling with clips (scary), and many other things. I love to tackle something new at least once a year and travel somewhere new. I would love to take a year and travel all around the world but that will have to be some other time when we actually have money and the freedom to do so, probably when we are retired!

We got a “test child”, Charlie the dog, that has been a wonderful addition to our little family. Then I found my husband and I a part-time job at a Crisis Nursery as weekend house parents that take care of kids who are in limbo with the foster system or the parents need time away from their children. A lot of the kids have behavioral or emotional issues so it was quite the experience for both Explorer Buds! Definitely let me see how my husband would handle difficult children and also his wonderful soft side with them. We live where there is a lot of babies!! So it is easy to feel surrounded by pregnant women and babies any time of the year. The baby fever began to hit Mr. Explorer Bud before me but it soon caught me a little after a year of being married. We of course thought what everyone does that we would get pregnant within the first few months without a problem…well that of course was not the case!!

After going off Birth Control for a few months and not getting AF I went into my doctor to discuss if my Hypothyroidism could be a cause and if we needed to adjust my medications. The doctor told me not to worry and to wait a few more months and that he was sure everything was fine. I knew that there was something else wrong so I did the smart thing and went to an Endocrinologist, someone that would know a bit more about Hypothyroidism. At this time I was training for my third marathon and a sprint triathlon at the same time and instead of losing or maintaining the scale kept rising. I have always been in excellent condition and never overweight but since my thyroid had started to slowly stop working the weight had been creeping on. After some convincing of the Endocrinologist and her assessment that yes I did not look like the typical marathoner and no I wasn’t stuffing myself with junk food that she would run not only thyroid but a full hormone panel to see what was causing AF to be absent for so long. The tests came back and we discovered that I had the start of PCOS and my thyroid was too low. In came Metformin and boy was that a joyous journey. It seems doctors have some problems giving you a heads up on the side effects of medicine and I soon found out the lovely intestinal issues that come with Metformin. Luckily my neighbor, who is a nurse, filled me in and I was able to fix most of those problems. The doctor also informed me that if I wanted to have kids I should go see a specialist soon because I wasn’t getting any younger, mind you I live where most people are having kids in their early 20’s so a 29 year old is pretty old to be starting having kids around here. Yes the doctor has quite the bedside manner but she is the best in the area.

Off I went to the RE to discuss our options and what we should be doing differently. We started with Clomid and after 3 months of nothing happening Mr. Explorer Bud’s SA which came back with the bad news of 1% Morphology! So we were told our only option was IVF with ICSI which of course is lots of $$$$! At this point I started looking into clinics out of state and trial studies that we might qualify for. Sadly I didn’t qualify for most of them and the ones I did they didn’t cover anything. I found a few websites about going abroad to do IVF and started looking into that. I have travelled a lot and knew that places like Thailand you could get excellent medical care for a fraction of the price. Of course I started looking for places that looked fun to go to and that the clinics had good feedback and weren’t incredibly expensive. I had settled on going to Greece but discovered when I wanted to go was going to be very expensive just to get there and staying wasn’t economical so my savings went out the door. I then found a clinic in Panama that had good results, the doctor was very helpful and there was a medical tourism company to assist me with the process. So the hubby and I put our cars up for sale and sold both of them so that we could pay off our debt and get the money to go along with buy a very used car to share.

We made our plans to go to Panama, unfortunately Mr. Explorer Bud was only able to come for a few days to give his sperm sample, as he is in school and his professors said there was no way he would pass if he missed more than 2 classes. Luckily my Mom was able to come the whole time with me so I would have someone to hold my hand. Our first round of IVF with ICSI was a great experience in the doctor was excellent to work with and listened to all my questions and what I wanted to be done. The medical tourism company we went with were also great and accompanied us to every appointment which was a great stress reliever as there are limited signs in Panama and it is easy to get lost. I was one of the lucky ones that the injections didn't bother me and I actually felt better while on them! It did help that my Mom gave them to me and she is an excellent shot giver! We ended up with 3 grade A eggs that we put in and I flew back home hopeful that this was going to end with a baby. I had a lot of spotting throughout and my BETA’s were 71 and then 172 so we figured everything was going good. At 7 weeks we went in to see how many and discovered there were none in the Uterus and that I had one in my left fallopian tube thriving. Little did the embryo know it couldn’t thrive in a fallopian tube so we went in that evening for emergency surgery to remove our one success. I was soo mad that it didn’t work and frustrated because we had used our savings to pay for our one shot which did work just not the right way! We were blessed that my parents offered to pay for round two and so we are getting ready to try again this February! I am apprehensively hopeful that this time it will be fine and we will have a baby at the end of this. If not, we are not sure of the next step for us as Mr. Explorer Bud is not ready to explore adoption.

I am excited to keep track of our journey this time around and share our experience with all of you. I will be writing soon!

Explorer Bud

Beta #1= Success!

I just got a call from our nurse at the RE's office.

Beta #1 (9dp5dt)= 152! That is a fantastic number. I go back in 2 days to see if it is doubling correctly.

I actually got my BFP at 5dp5dt on an HPT. I decided to test early since that was really the only normal thing I get to do during an IVF cycle, and I was dying to know if I was PG. I tested out my trigger and it had been out for about 4 days. I got a BFN the morning before my BFP.

I woke Mr. Sassy Bud up to tell him and he said "Yayyy! Can I go back to sleep now?" To be fair, it was 3am. I was up getting ready for a football trip we were going on and he still had another 45 minutes to sleep. I thought his reaction was cute.

I am so thankful that I have had a perfect IVF cycle so far, minus getting very sick during the first week of stims. After 22 months, I can finally say, I am pregnant!

Embryo transfer complete!

Today I am 2dp5dt. (In English, 2 days past my 5 day transfer).

A 5 day transfer is done 5 days after the egg retrieval (as opposed to a 3dt, which is 3 days past the ER). 5 day transfers are usually done when you have a lot of high quality embryos and they want to see which ones are the best on day 5. I am lucky to have had 6 perfect ones on day 3 so they waited until day 5 to do my transfer.

The ET itself was quick and easy. They let Mr. Sassy Bud come in with me and we got to watch on a TV screen as the embryologist scooped the embryos up in the catheter and brought them into our room. Then we got to watch them being inserted on the ultrasound machine.

I can't remember the specific grading of the embryos, but they were great! Here's a picture of them:

At this stage they are called blastocysts. The mass is where the baby will form.

They also gave us a picture of where the embryos were placed:

The plus marks are where the embryos are. Not many people get an ultrasound this early, so I guess that is a benefit of IVF! Haha. I had a progesterone draw today. I will have my beta pregnancy blood draw one week from today. I'm not sure if I can keep from POAS until then, but I will probably have Mr. Sassy Bud hide all my tests so I don't test too early.