My temps have plumetted over the past 2 days. Not surprised tho. I knew my lack of symptoms were telling me the truth. I'm not sure why I was even disappointed on Saturday when I tested and got a BFN again. I should be used to the disappointment but it still put me in a crappy mood on Sunday. I spent the entire day cleaning just to try and keep my mind off of it. Lately, I find myself trying to do things to put my mind somewhere else. I'm so consumed with frustration and obsessed during the 2WW it's ALL I can think about. Work is boring so all I do is google this crap all day. (Not literally crap for all you sick minded like myself who are entertained by it) I've started trying to read more which has really seemed to help. Watching too much t.v. doesnt do the trick b/c after the show is over I realize I'm right back in my shitty situation again. I've gotten into baking/decorating cupckaes and of course have tried to stay busy with my other hobbies. Keeping my mind occupied has def started to help.
I have been talking to Mr.BB for those who are wondering. I'm still exceptionally frustrated with him though. I tried to talk to him last night but all he does is shut down when I try to talk about something serious. However, he did tell me that he thinks something is wrong with him and that he has has "pain" on one side of his you know what for the past couple of years. He seems to think they are "twisted." Why he hasn't gone to the doctor about this is beyond me. This could be our answer and he chooses to not care. Then he makes jokes that he has cancer and that he would rather not know if he is going to die from it. This man kills me. So, now I will have to begin a 6 month battle with him to try and talk him into going to the doctor.
I feel as if there is no point in TTC until this thing with his "boys" can be worked out. Maybe I will see what its like to not obsess for a month or two. I'm dealing with the most stubborn man in the Midwest so God only knows how long it will take him to go have this checked out. I'm going on vacation to Florida at the end of May so maybe I will try to enjoy those days by drowning in Bud Light while smoking a pack of Camels on the beach each day. Heck, I might even try Parasailing. Eff trying to protect my little ute for the next couple of months. I'm so sick and tired of being sad. I think if I were to get happy again I would be stuck so far in this depression that I wouldnt even be able to be happy again.
With that being said, you may not be hearing from me as much as you have lately. Of course I will post ANY updates as soon as they come. But I think I need a break. It's going to be difficult trying to not temp each morning. Hopefully I will be able to give myself a break......it's become an addiction.
So long for now.....
-Buckeye Bud
Showing posts with label Buckeye Bud. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Buckeye Bud. Show all posts
April 23, 2012
April 20, 2012
11 DPO
Here is last months chart. (March 2012)
Here is my current chart. (April 2012)
A fellow Bud told me that she likes to think that seeing anything different that what she is used to seeing could be a good sign. So I'm gonna try to stick to that. I had another small temperature rise today. Got a negative HPT though.
Anyways, TGIF!
-Buckeye Bud
April 19, 2012
10 DPO and I NEED A Punching Bag
My chart shows I'm still up there. I took a hpt yesterday like a dummy and of course I got a negative. I have had a lot of CCM the past few days. Mostly before noon each day. I might try and test tomorrow morning and if I get a negative I will just assume the worst. All times prior to this I have gotten positives by 11DPO. I know all are different so assuming isn't the smartest. AF is set to arrive on Monday which I really think is gonna happen no matter how hard I wish.
Another thing I wanna talk about but I am kind of hesistant. It's embarrassing and frustrating. Mr. BB is annoying the crap out of me. I am SO frustrated with him I just wanna smack him around and maybe knock some sense into him. Several months ago I told him that it would be a good option that if I wasnt KU by February that he should get tested. He agreed and said that I would need to be the one to deliver it back to their office if he could do it at home. I guess he is embarrassed by a little semen!
February rolls around and he said he wasnt gonna get tested until my PCOS meds actually got in my system. So he put it off another 2 months. Here it is 2 months later. Ive been asking him the past 2 weeks about getting tested and he keeps blowing me off. I called me RE's office and they told me that he has to get a scrip from his PCP and then just take it to my RE's lab next door. I relayed this info to him and he completely dismissed me. He refuses to call his doctor b/c he thinks they wont just write him a scrip without him coming in for an office visit. He just "assumes."
I come home last night and ask him if he called his doctor. This is what I get, "just drop it. I'm not talking about this now. If I was gonna do it, Im not gonna do it anytime soon."
I wanted to cry but I was too pissed!! I said back to him, "Do you have any idea how hopeless I am already and you saying no to this makes it 10x worse." I've reminded him of all the thousands of dollars I have spent already and how many times I've been stuck with needles, and poked where I dont wanna be poked. He didnt even seem to care and told me that I go to the doctors all the time. WTF does that mean? I told him I felt so alone with this issue and that I was the only one who really wanted this. He of course just said no and then continued watching stupid Pawn Stars on the tube.
I am livid. I ignored him the rest of the night and havn't talked to him today. I know it sounds immature but I am ready to proove my point. You dont help me, I dont help you. Feed yourself and do your own laundry. Buckeye Bud is about to make it nasty up in heah! I am tired of playing with this man. I've been dealing with this since 2010 and I'm so fed up with him and his pride. He's embarrassed to squirt it in the cup.....thats all it is. I cannot talk to or even try to rationalize with him right now. I might just have to bring out the tears if this approach doesn't work in a few days. Tears usually get his attention ;) He knows I mean business then.
Please tell me I'm not the only one with a man who has acted like this in regards to being tested! Any suggestions on how to get thru to him?!
-Buckeye Bud
Another thing I wanna talk about but I am kind of hesistant. It's embarrassing and frustrating. Mr. BB is annoying the crap out of me. I am SO frustrated with him I just wanna smack him around and maybe knock some sense into him. Several months ago I told him that it would be a good option that if I wasnt KU by February that he should get tested. He agreed and said that I would need to be the one to deliver it back to their office if he could do it at home. I guess he is embarrassed by a little semen!February rolls around and he said he wasnt gonna get tested until my PCOS meds actually got in my system. So he put it off another 2 months. Here it is 2 months later. Ive been asking him the past 2 weeks about getting tested and he keeps blowing me off. I called me RE's office and they told me that he has to get a scrip from his PCP and then just take it to my RE's lab next door. I relayed this info to him and he completely dismissed me. He refuses to call his doctor b/c he thinks they wont just write him a scrip without him coming in for an office visit. He just "assumes."
I come home last night and ask him if he called his doctor. This is what I get, "just drop it. I'm not talking about this now. If I was gonna do it, Im not gonna do it anytime soon."
I wanted to cry but I was too pissed!! I said back to him, "Do you have any idea how hopeless I am already and you saying no to this makes it 10x worse." I've reminded him of all the thousands of dollars I have spent already and how many times I've been stuck with needles, and poked where I dont wanna be poked. He didnt even seem to care and told me that I go to the doctors all the time. WTF does that mean? I told him I felt so alone with this issue and that I was the only one who really wanted this. He of course just said no and then continued watching stupid Pawn Stars on the tube.
I am livid. I ignored him the rest of the night and havn't talked to him today. I know it sounds immature but I am ready to proove my point. You dont help me, I dont help you. Feed yourself and do your own laundry. Buckeye Bud is about to make it nasty up in heah! I am tired of playing with this man. I've been dealing with this since 2010 and I'm so fed up with him and his pride. He's embarrassed to squirt it in the cup.....thats all it is. I cannot talk to or even try to rationalize with him right now. I might just have to bring out the tears if this approach doesn't work in a few days. Tears usually get his attention ;) He knows I mean business then.
Please tell me I'm not the only one with a man who has acted like this in regards to being tested! Any suggestions on how to get thru to him?!
-Buckeye Bud
April 17, 2012
Possible Triphasic Pattern - Part 2
I'm still pondering this possible triphasic pattern. Here is day 2 of my 2nd thermal shift. When I took this temp this morning I did get a little discouraged because I did not want anytype of drop. But I've been searching thru FF charts and finding that it's normal to not have several days of solid rising temps. That smalls dips like this are okay.
I'm trying to keep in mind that just because I have a triphasic pattern it does not mean that I am K/U. It's just nice to have a little taste of hope every now and then.
I'm trying to keep in mind that just because I have a triphasic pattern it does not mean that I am K/U. It's just nice to have a little taste of hope every now and then.
I will update 2morrow with new temp.....please pray for me.
-Buckeye Bud.
April 16, 2012
Starting of a Triphasic Pattern??
Lets hope so!! I actually got excited this morning when I started reading about temperature rises 7DPO. I read that this could be a good sign. It does however seem to be a bit early but maybe it's possible to get early implantation. I also didnt really have a clear temp drop so I'm not sure if that has to occur in a triphasic or not.
I reviewed all of my previous months (Nov '11-March '12) temperatures on 7DPO and I have never gotten such a large spike on this day. They all seemed to be going down at this point in my cycle. I did wake up kind of sweaty this morning so I guess it is possible to contribute that toward the temp spike. But I didnt sleep with any extra blankets or clothing that I usually do. No need to speculate I guess.
I need some opinions or personal accounts with this type of triphasic pattern!
I reviewed all of my previous months (Nov '11-March '12) temperatures on 7DPO and I have never gotten such a large spike on this day. They all seemed to be going down at this point in my cycle. I did wake up kind of sweaty this morning so I guess it is possible to contribute that toward the temp spike. But I didnt sleep with any extra blankets or clothing that I usually do. No need to speculate I guess.
I need some opinions or personal accounts with this type of triphasic pattern!
April 13, 2012
CD16
Well, nothing too much to report on. FF shows that I O'd on CD12 - Monday the 9th. (Today is Friday the 3th) At the time, I had gotten a postive OPK on that Sunday the 8th. On that Monday morning, I got a negative OPK and a Peak reading on my CBEFM. I really do think I O'd that day b/c I got a pain in my left ovary that only lasted for about 10 secs. We BD'd at about 10pm on Monday night. I really really hope we didnt do it too late- considering eggs "could" only last 12 hours. Please pray that we timed it perfectly.
-Buckeye Bud
-Buckeye Bud
April 2, 2012
Nearly 2 Years TTC & I'm Sick of Being So Sad
Sorry for the delay in writing recently, I just haven't been feeling it. Nothing to report on.....ever. Same song and dance with me feeling sorry for myself. It get's so old. I just want to be happy again. I'm tired of thinking about TTC. I would love to go to the doc and get back on my anti-dep's but if I'm TTC that's a no-no. Sigh....
My CBEFM didn't really help me out and my FF is confused as hell. I got a "Peak" reading on the CD 12 and 13. My understanding was that I was supposed to do the BD on those days and the days prior to the Peak reading. I still dint know if this is right, but according to FF I didn't OV until CD15 (and that's after dismissing 2 readings b/c i took them at 10am rather than 6am) Needless to say, it didn't work.
I've also noticed, that my body isn't waiting the full 15 days for AF to arrive (if I'm OV'ing when I think I did). It's always 12-13 day leutal phase. I have tons of the Progesterone beads my RE gave me, but I really dread those things. Has anyone ever tried the Progesterone cream they sell at CVS or Walgreens. That seems much simpler. I know that if your leutal phase doesn't last long enough it's considered a defect. Which really wouldn't surprise me......I'm jacked up in so many other ways as it is. Does anyone have this??
I am still on 1500mg's on my Glumetza (Metformin). I took 2 before bed time last night and I haven't been sick this morning. So, as long as I eat a meal tonight for dinner I will take a total of 4 today. On a better note, I feel as if this stuff is finally starting to work on my hormones. My face is clearing up wonderfully and I can I only have 1 pimple!!!! This is so effing exciting since there hasn't been a day in the past 11 months where I have had less than 10! Unfortunately, my face has been left with SO many scars. I wear a pound of makeup to cover, but knowing my skin is destroyed makes me sad. Anyone have any suggestions on treatments for this that wont add any extra oil to my face??
Anyways, today is my CD 5 so I will begin my CBEFM again 2morrow. I'm skipping the Femara this month just b/c. Please pray for me that I am given a gift this month.
-Buckeye Bud
My CBEFM didn't really help me out and my FF is confused as hell. I got a "Peak" reading on the CD 12 and 13. My understanding was that I was supposed to do the BD on those days and the days prior to the Peak reading. I still dint know if this is right, but according to FF I didn't OV until CD15 (and that's after dismissing 2 readings b/c i took them at 10am rather than 6am) Needless to say, it didn't work.
I've also noticed, that my body isn't waiting the full 15 days for AF to arrive (if I'm OV'ing when I think I did). It's always 12-13 day leutal phase. I have tons of the Progesterone beads my RE gave me, but I really dread those things. Has anyone ever tried the Progesterone cream they sell at CVS or Walgreens. That seems much simpler. I know that if your leutal phase doesn't last long enough it's considered a defect. Which really wouldn't surprise me......I'm jacked up in so many other ways as it is. Does anyone have this??
I am still on 1500mg's on my Glumetza (Metformin). I took 2 before bed time last night and I haven't been sick this morning. So, as long as I eat a meal tonight for dinner I will take a total of 4 today. On a better note, I feel as if this stuff is finally starting to work on my hormones. My face is clearing up wonderfully and I can I only have 1 pimple!!!! This is so effing exciting since there hasn't been a day in the past 11 months where I have had less than 10! Unfortunately, my face has been left with SO many scars. I wear a pound of makeup to cover, but knowing my skin is destroyed makes me sad. Anyone have any suggestions on treatments for this that wont add any extra oil to my face??
Anyways, today is my CD 5 so I will begin my CBEFM again 2morrow. I'm skipping the Femara this month just b/c. Please pray for me that I am given a gift this month.
-Buckeye Bud
March 13, 2012
I Love You Snooki. I Hate You Snooki. I Love You Snooki.
Sorry I havn't posted in a while. I've just been really down lately. There are so many lucky women announcing their pregnancies that it just makes me feel so hopeless. I'm pretty sure I counted 13 women on my FB in the past three months makes their announcements. EVEN FRIGGIN SNOOKI IS KNOCKED UP (for the record, I effing love her)! It's bittersweet. I can't imagine living a life where this wasn't on my mind 24/7.
Don't get me wrong, I am SO happy that these women can experience this joy. But I sometimes imagine what my life would be like if I knew for sure this was never going to happen for me. And to be honest, it really does mess with your will to live. I'm a woman and it's my job to make and raise babies and the thought that this may never happen kills my spirit. But I won't give up....the hope is all I have to hold onto. On paper, it seems I have so many things worked out. My 4 pregnancy losses have been explained (so they say). But then in the back of my mind those aren't concrete answers so I'm left thinking.....what if these reasons weren't what caused them like they think.
My PCOS being discovered gave me hope for a minute. But then it faded because I study my Fertility Friend Chart probably 10X a day. It was my understanding that with PCOS a lot of women don't ovulate. Which is why I thought I wasn't getting KU. But According to my OPK's and several of my charts I do show that I ovulated (temp spike). That then leads me to think that maybe my hormones are saying I ovulated but the egg was never actually released. Then I start thinking, "well maybe it's Mr. BB!" Or maybe it's my CM. Maybe the consistency is off! AHhh what a mess I have going on inside my own mind. I need out.....but a break is not even an option in my world.
So that's where I'm at emotionally. Physically, I'm doing so so. I am currently on my 4th week of Glumetza (Metformin). I am at 1500mg each day and I'm not sure when I will be able to add in another 500mg. Week 1 was fine with 500mg. Then on week 2 I started at 1000mg. That's when I started to get insanely nauseous and my appetite dimished. I got brave 10 days later and started the 1500mg. I still feel nauseous but not as badly as before. I've noticed that about an hour after I eat (no matter what I eat) I feel SO hungry again. WTF?! I thought this was supposed to help me lose weight?! Nothing at all sounds good to eat but then I'm starved at the same time. This is bullshit if ya ask me. I'm hoping it's just a temporary side effect and will go away once I hit 2000mg's a day. We'll see.
Here are some of my other updates:
CD 3-7 I took my fertility med Femara (alternate to Clomid) each day for these 5 days.
CD 8-9 ClearBlue Easy Fertility Monitor stated Low Fertility.
CD 10- ClearBlue Easy Fertility Monitor stated High Fertility. Increase in CM. Did the BD.
CD 11- ClearBlue Easy Fertility Monitor stated High Fertility. Increased CM. Positive OPK.
I feel well equipped.....so beat it AF.....I don't wanna see your ugly mug anymore for a while! However, if that bish does decide to come this month, I have plans to get some PreSeed Sperm Friendly Lubricant. I get SO burnt out on the BD by day2 that my poor vajay get's tired! (LOL...sorry TMI). Maybe then Mr.BB's little swimmers will be more apt to hang around for a longer period of time up there. THEN, in 2 months, if that doesn't work, Mr. BB has to throw in the towel, swallow his pride, and go get tested himself. In the meantime, I will continue to take my synthetic folic acid, 81mg of Asprin, Glumetza, and my NeevoDHA prenatal.
So that's where I'm at and that's our plan Stan. I'll keep everyone updated on this CBEFM and if it matches up with my FF chart.
Don't get me wrong, I am SO happy that these women can experience this joy. But I sometimes imagine what my life would be like if I knew for sure this was never going to happen for me. And to be honest, it really does mess with your will to live. I'm a woman and it's my job to make and raise babies and the thought that this may never happen kills my spirit. But I won't give up....the hope is all I have to hold onto. On paper, it seems I have so many things worked out. My 4 pregnancy losses have been explained (so they say). But then in the back of my mind those aren't concrete answers so I'm left thinking.....what if these reasons weren't what caused them like they think.
My PCOS being discovered gave me hope for a minute. But then it faded because I study my Fertility Friend Chart probably 10X a day. It was my understanding that with PCOS a lot of women don't ovulate. Which is why I thought I wasn't getting KU. But According to my OPK's and several of my charts I do show that I ovulated (temp spike). That then leads me to think that maybe my hormones are saying I ovulated but the egg was never actually released. Then I start thinking, "well maybe it's Mr. BB!" Or maybe it's my CM. Maybe the consistency is off! AHhh what a mess I have going on inside my own mind. I need out.....but a break is not even an option in my world.
So that's where I'm at emotionally. Physically, I'm doing so so. I am currently on my 4th week of Glumetza (Metformin). I am at 1500mg each day and I'm not sure when I will be able to add in another 500mg. Week 1 was fine with 500mg. Then on week 2 I started at 1000mg. That's when I started to get insanely nauseous and my appetite dimished. I got brave 10 days later and started the 1500mg. I still feel nauseous but not as badly as before. I've noticed that about an hour after I eat (no matter what I eat) I feel SO hungry again. WTF?! I thought this was supposed to help me lose weight?! Nothing at all sounds good to eat but then I'm starved at the same time. This is bullshit if ya ask me. I'm hoping it's just a temporary side effect and will go away once I hit 2000mg's a day. We'll see.
Here are some of my other updates:
CD 3-7 I took my fertility med Femara (alternate to Clomid) each day for these 5 days.
CD 8-9 ClearBlue Easy Fertility Monitor stated Low Fertility.
CD 10- ClearBlue Easy Fertility Monitor stated High Fertility. Increase in CM. Did the BD.
CD 11- ClearBlue Easy Fertility Monitor stated High Fertility. Increased CM. Positive OPK.
I feel well equipped.....so beat it AF.....I don't wanna see your ugly mug anymore for a while! However, if that bish does decide to come this month, I have plans to get some PreSeed Sperm Friendly Lubricant. I get SO burnt out on the BD by day2 that my poor vajay get's tired! (LOL...sorry TMI). Maybe then Mr.BB's little swimmers will be more apt to hang around for a longer period of time up there. THEN, in 2 months, if that doesn't work, Mr. BB has to throw in the towel, swallow his pride, and go get tested himself. In the meantime, I will continue to take my synthetic folic acid, 81mg of Asprin, Glumetza, and my NeevoDHA prenatal.
So that's where I'm at and that's our plan Stan. I'll keep everyone updated on this CBEFM and if it matches up with my FF chart.
February 28, 2012
CD23
So today is my CD23. No reason to think I am preggers. My tatas have been sore the past couple of days but that has been happening the past couple of months after I O (or think I have O'd). I had some cramps 2 days ago (7dpo) but I have nothing to blame it on. Here is my current chart:
As you can see, nothing spectacular. Trying to compare my chart to the past few months charts, I havn't really noticed any trends or patterns. I'm not supposed to start my period for another 6 days and my temp is dropping already. Not sure what to make of that.
Tonight I begin my new dosage of Glumetza. 1000mg's for the next 7 days. I have yet to have any side effects of the 500mg's I've been on for the past 7 days. But I have been sure to only take the meds after a meal just as my Endo advised. Hopefully I will avoid the side effects entirely.
I keep trying to tell myself that my situation is only going to be downhill from here. I'm getting this PCOS under control. And I've got my MTHFR mutations taken care of with my new NeevoDHA prenatal. I'm just praying this will happen for me and Mr. BB this Spring.
That's all I have for now.....will post updates if they come.
Tonight I begin my new dosage of Glumetza. 1000mg's for the next 7 days. I have yet to have any side effects of the 500mg's I've been on for the past 7 days. But I have been sure to only take the meds after a meal just as my Endo advised. Hopefully I will avoid the side effects entirely.
I keep trying to tell myself that my situation is only going to be downhill from here. I'm getting this PCOS under control. And I've got my MTHFR mutations taken care of with my new NeevoDHA prenatal. I'm just praying this will happen for me and Mr. BB this Spring.
That's all I have for now.....will post updates if they come.
February 21, 2012
Long Awaited Answers
I'm not sure I had ever been more excited to go to the doctor than I was today. Hold on, I take that back. Baby 1's 1st ultrasound was the most exciting moment of my life until I found out I had miscarried. But any who, I went to the endocrinologist today and met one of the most amazing doctors I have ever had the privilege of directly dealing with. After going over my recent blood work and all of my symptoms (which includes severe facial acne, facial hair (blonde, thank GOD), oily skin, irregular cycles, high testosterone levels, and infertility) she was able to diagnose me with PCOS (Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome)!!!
It might sound crazy but I could not be more excited to finally have someone confirm with me that there IS something wrong with me hormonally. In June of last year I had a dermatologist tell me that my acne was due to hormones. In August I had an acupuncturist tell me many of my symptoms were hormonal (excessive sweating and body heat) I wasn't sure how to approach my RE about this so it kind of just sat in the back of my mind. I certainly wasn't as educated about the reproductive system as I am now, otherwise I would of spoken up about it.
So, rather than Metformin, which is what most women seem to be treated with, my Endo chose to put me on the brand name GLUMETZA. Unlike immediate-release metformin, GLUMETZA is released slowly and steadily over several hours. This delay in the release of the medicine may result in fewer stomach-related side effects, such as nausea, in the 1st week of taking the medication. She wants to get me up to 2000mg a day, so here is my future dosing schedule:
She also advised she would like me to reduce my carbohydrate intake to less than 120g daily and my protein up to 60g daily (at least). She says that will boost my weight loss since I'm currently at a standstill after losing 20lbs.
**Also, She said that my initial weight gain is what actually brought the PCOS to the surface. Since I have been off of BC since April 2010, the weight gain triggered it. And even after losing the 20lbs it won't completely go away. It has actually made it worse for some strange reason. It gets worse each and every week.
SO, my other good news involves my 2 MTHFR gene mutations, which my Endo happened to know a lot about. For those who don't know what this is......it's a blood disease that deals with blood clotting and the inability for my body to metabolize Folic acid. She explained that the Folic acid that I currently have a prescription for (1mg 2x daily) is considered synthetic Folic acid. She wrote me a prescription for NEEVO DHA. This is a prenatal that also contains L-Methlyfolate, nature’s active form of folate as found in leafy green foods. L-methylfolate is superior to synthetic folic acid. Several months ago one of the BB Blog readers commented on my post about this so it has always been in my mind. And to my surprise today my Endo mentioned this so I became pretty excited. This will be taken in place of my existing Pre-Natal 1x daily. On a side note, she did tell me that these mutations were most likely the cause of my 3 miscarriages (not the 1 tubal though). No one has yet to tell me that (not even my RE) so it was such an amazing feeling to hear that news. Nearly 2 years I have been waiting to hear that.
If you also unfortunate enough to have 2 mutuations of the MTHFR gene and would like additional information, here is the brands website:
http://www.neevodha.com/
Well, that is all I have for now, I will be very surprised if many make it through reading this entire posting. If you do, I much appreciate it :) So I end this cold rainy day with hope in my heart. Sad songs didn't sound so sad today, and my optimism is at the highest it has been in a very very long time. Please keep me in your prayers that I will soon get my baby back. I know he is up there waiting for me to bring him back down :) Let's hope the 5th time's a charm!!
It might sound crazy but I could not be more excited to finally have someone confirm with me that there IS something wrong with me hormonally. In June of last year I had a dermatologist tell me that my acne was due to hormones. In August I had an acupuncturist tell me many of my symptoms were hormonal (excessive sweating and body heat) I wasn't sure how to approach my RE about this so it kind of just sat in the back of my mind. I certainly wasn't as educated about the reproductive system as I am now, otherwise I would of spoken up about it.
So, rather than Metformin, which is what most women seem to be treated with, my Endo chose to put me on the brand name GLUMETZA. Unlike immediate-release metformin, GLUMETZA is released slowly and steadily over several hours. This delay in the release of the medicine may result in fewer stomach-related side effects, such as nausea, in the 1st week of taking the medication. She wants to get me up to 2000mg a day, so here is my future dosing schedule:
Week 1: 500mg 1x day
Week 2: 1000 mg 1x day
Week 3: 1500 mg 1x day
Week 4: 2000 mg 1x day
Week 2: 1000 mg 1x day
Week 3: 1500 mg 1x day
Week 4: 2000 mg 1x day
She also advised she would like me to reduce my carbohydrate intake to less than 120g daily and my protein up to 60g daily (at least). She says that will boost my weight loss since I'm currently at a standstill after losing 20lbs.
**Also, She said that my initial weight gain is what actually brought the PCOS to the surface. Since I have been off of BC since April 2010, the weight gain triggered it. And even after losing the 20lbs it won't completely go away. It has actually made it worse for some strange reason. It gets worse each and every week.
SO, my other good news involves my 2 MTHFR gene mutations, which my Endo happened to know a lot about. For those who don't know what this is......it's a blood disease that deals with blood clotting and the inability for my body to metabolize Folic acid. She explained that the Folic acid that I currently have a prescription for (1mg 2x daily) is considered synthetic Folic acid. She wrote me a prescription for NEEVO DHA. This is a prenatal that also contains L-Methlyfolate, nature’s active form of folate as found in leafy green foods. L-methylfolate is superior to synthetic folic acid. Several months ago one of the BB Blog readers commented on my post about this so it has always been in my mind. And to my surprise today my Endo mentioned this so I became pretty excited. This will be taken in place of my existing Pre-Natal 1x daily. On a side note, she did tell me that these mutations were most likely the cause of my 3 miscarriages (not the 1 tubal though). No one has yet to tell me that (not even my RE) so it was such an amazing feeling to hear that news. Nearly 2 years I have been waiting to hear that.
If you also unfortunate enough to have 2 mutuations of the MTHFR gene and would like additional information, here is the brands website:
http://www.neevodha.com/
Well, that is all I have for now, I will be very surprised if many make it through reading this entire posting. If you do, I much appreciate it :) So I end this cold rainy day with hope in my heart. Sad songs didn't sound so sad today, and my optimism is at the highest it has been in a very very long time. Please keep me in your prayers that I will soon get my baby back. I know he is up there waiting for me to bring him back down :) Let's hope the 5th time's a charm!!
February 18, 2012
No News Is.......Well......No News
I feel as if I havn't blogged in a while so here I am. Nothing too much to report though. I did get my appointment set up with the endocrinologist. They sent me my paper work and set up an appointment for April. Wait.....April? Yeah, pretty stinking ridiculous. I ended up calling them couple days later so I could be added to a cancellation list. It worked because I got a phone call yesterday saying they could see me this upcoming Tuesday. I'm sooooooo excited! I feel like this might actually give me some of the answers I've been looking for for so long. This journey began in September 2010 and it feels like 10 years ago. After 3 miscarriages, 1 ectopic pregnancy, and now infertility, I am so ready finally get my baby.
I know this might sound crazy, but I am praying for a PCOS diagnosis. I have almost ALL of the symptoms so I hope the blood work I get will show my hormones just aren't right. My testosterone was high about a month ago so I hope it hasn't gone back done, otherwise I'm afraid they wont give me any med's.
I got a positive OPK tonight. I figure we will do the BD for the next 3 days just in case. I hasn't worked the past 4 months so it's a long shot that it would work this month. I havn't started using my CBEFM yet. I wanna wait until my hormones are perfect before I use those expensive test strips!
Here is my current chart. I have FF so confused. Check out how many fertile days it has me set at! My cycles are so jacked right now!
Well, that is all for now. I will post again this week after I see my Endo. Cross your fingers for me! Oh, and a HUGE shout-out to Diva Bud for her AMAZING news! Congrats girl.....you deserve it!
I know this might sound crazy, but I am praying for a PCOS diagnosis. I have almost ALL of the symptoms so I hope the blood work I get will show my hormones just aren't right. My testosterone was high about a month ago so I hope it hasn't gone back done, otherwise I'm afraid they wont give me any med's.
I got a positive OPK tonight. I figure we will do the BD for the next 3 days just in case. I hasn't worked the past 4 months so it's a long shot that it would work this month. I havn't started using my CBEFM yet. I wanna wait until my hormones are perfect before I use those expensive test strips!
Here is my current chart. I have FF so confused. Check out how many fertile days it has me set at! My cycles are so jacked right now!
February 7, 2012
CD2 & A Chance of PCOS
Well, no BFP this month. AF arrived yesterday 1 day early. I knew it wasn't gonna happen. Something just didn't see right. I've had that feeling the past 4-5 months actually. My face has been sooooooo broken out. And now its so scarred up I have to wear 3lbs of makeup. I'm totally overweight although I did loose 20lbs last summer. (I'm currently 5'3 and 175)
My cycles have varied so much recently in regards to the length. So after reading a lot on our blog and my google OCD, I found that I have almost all of the symptoms of PCOS. So, I went to my family doc for my routine physical and had her check my testosterone and free testosterone. My free testosterone came back at 4.7 (norm is 0.2-5.0pg/mL) and my Total Testosterone came back at 50 H (norm2-45 ng/dl).
So that shows my testosterone is too high, just as I suspected. So today I had an appointment with my regular OB who agreed that I have most of the symptoms (some I didn't care to list on here). She referred me to an endocrinologist. It could be 2 months before I can get to meet with them :( But this does give me some hope. We spoke of the Metaformin (spelling?) and my hopes are that they will put me on this. Other option would be BCP, which I obviously do not want.
I just pray that this gets squared away soon. I'm 28 years old and acne should be the last of my worries. But it has led me to the answers I have been questioning since I got off BCP 3 years ago.
To my fellow buds......was it hard to get a diagnosis for PCOS? How do you like the metaformin? Does it control your symptoms??
My cycles have varied so much recently in regards to the length. So after reading a lot on our blog and my google OCD, I found that I have almost all of the symptoms of PCOS. So, I went to my family doc for my routine physical and had her check my testosterone and free testosterone. My free testosterone came back at 4.7 (norm is 0.2-5.0pg/mL) and my Total Testosterone came back at 50 H (norm2-45 ng/dl).
So that shows my testosterone is too high, just as I suspected. So today I had an appointment with my regular OB who agreed that I have most of the symptoms (some I didn't care to list on here). She referred me to an endocrinologist. It could be 2 months before I can get to meet with them :( But this does give me some hope. We spoke of the Metaformin (spelling?) and my hopes are that they will put me on this. Other option would be BCP, which I obviously do not want.
I just pray that this gets squared away soon. I'm 28 years old and acne should be the last of my worries. But it has led me to the answers I have been questioning since I got off BCP 3 years ago.
To my fellow buds......was it hard to get a diagnosis for PCOS? How do you like the metaformin? Does it control your symptoms??
February 2, 2012
In God's Time
I heard this song today and it reminded me so much of this journey we are/have all been on. If you are not a fan of country music than you might not like this. But I am a HUGE fan of country music and Randy Houser so I have fallen in love with this song. It makes me cry......A LOT :(
January 30, 2012
CD26
Hey ladies, nothing new to report with me. I'm currently in my 2 week wait. Day 6 to be exact. We only did the BD the day before ovulation occurred. Don't ask me why......We actually haven't even done the baby dance too much this month anyways. Just one of those months I suppose. Expectations are still 50/50 for the cycle. As always....
Here's my chart.
Here's my chart.
I finally got my CBE Fertility Monitor in the mail. I'm excited to start using it. But the directions seem really complicated.....sigh.
In the meantime, my mind is staying occupied with our laundry room renovation. New paint, new cabinets, and new ceramic tile. Woot Woot! I just hope we get done ASAP.....everything that was in that room is now in my kitchen (including deep freezer and washer & dryer.)
I went to my family doctor last week for my yearly physical. I had her test my free testosterone and a few other things. I hear that can be related to acne. Which by the way has been absolutely terrible the past 3-4 months. I have no idea why.....it just keeps getting worse and worse. I have even resorted to using Oxy 10, which is 10% Benzoyl Peroxide. It doesn't even phase it. Just dries my skin out super super bad. I never even had this problem in H.S., so WTH?!! I should hear back from her within a couple of days.
Anywho, hope everyone is doing as well as expected. I know personally, I'm so tired of being without baby. Let me re-phrase that, I'm sad. To the core, completely, totally, absolutely, ridiculously sad. Will things ever change :(
In the meantime, my mind is staying occupied with our laundry room renovation. New paint, new cabinets, and new ceramic tile. Woot Woot! I just hope we get done ASAP.....everything that was in that room is now in my kitchen (including deep freezer and washer & dryer.)
I went to my family doctor last week for my yearly physical. I had her test my free testosterone and a few other things. I hear that can be related to acne. Which by the way has been absolutely terrible the past 3-4 months. I have no idea why.....it just keeps getting worse and worse. I have even resorted to using Oxy 10, which is 10% Benzoyl Peroxide. It doesn't even phase it. Just dries my skin out super super bad. I never even had this problem in H.S., so WTH?!! I should hear back from her within a couple of days.
Anywho, hope everyone is doing as well as expected. I know personally, I'm so tired of being without baby. Let me re-phrase that, I'm sad. To the core, completely, totally, absolutely, ridiculously sad. Will things ever change :(
January 22, 2012
CD18......Really?!
Well my oh my, guess whose little egg should be dropping in the next 24-48 hours? Mine! Mine! Good grief! This cycle has just been ridiculous! All kinds of thoughts/fears have been running through my head.
I usually ovulate between CD12-CD14. Here I am CD18 and I FINALLY get a positive OPK. I have been testing 3X a day since CD9. Good thing I buy my OPK's off Ebay super cheap. Like I've said the past few posts, I'm thinking the leaking sewer gases I was exposed to could of been the reason for out-of-the-ordinary cycle. That or work stress has finally caught up with me.
I've read online that ovulating too late in your cycle can cause a reduced chance of conceiving because your eggs might not be in sync with the lining of your uterus or the eggs could be old, or yada yada yada. Either way, I won't have too high of expectations by the time the end of this cycle rolls around. It's just not been a good month.
Anyways, I'm SOOOOO excited to share that Mr.Buckeye Bud bought be a ClearBlue Easy Fertility Monitor. For those who dont know what it does..............
It measures your estrogen (which rises prior to ovulation) and it measures your LH. Because I'm such a tight wod with money, I did a lot of research to find it at the cheapest place. Which was Wal-Mart's website. $180 got us the monitor and a pack of 30 strips.
Does anyone have one? And if so, how do you like it thus far? Has anyone conceived using this technology?
I usually ovulate between CD12-CD14. Here I am CD18 and I FINALLY get a positive OPK. I have been testing 3X a day since CD9. Good thing I buy my OPK's off Ebay super cheap. Like I've said the past few posts, I'm thinking the leaking sewer gases I was exposed to could of been the reason for out-of-the-ordinary cycle. That or work stress has finally caught up with me.
I've read online that ovulating too late in your cycle can cause a reduced chance of conceiving because your eggs might not be in sync with the lining of your uterus or the eggs could be old, or yada yada yada. Either way, I won't have too high of expectations by the time the end of this cycle rolls around. It's just not been a good month.
Anyways, I'm SOOOOO excited to share that Mr.Buckeye Bud bought be a ClearBlue Easy Fertility Monitor. For those who dont know what it does..............
It measures your estrogen (which rises prior to ovulation) and it measures your LH. Because I'm such a tight wod with money, I did a lot of research to find it at the cheapest place. Which was Wal-Mart's website. $180 got us the monitor and a pack of 30 strips.
Does anyone have one? And if so, how do you like it thus far? Has anyone conceived using this technology?
January 18, 2012
CD14
Well, here I am on CD14 and I have yet to get a positive OPK. All cycles prior to this over the past year I would have gotten a positive by now. My suspicions are that the leaking sewer gas we discovered in our house might have something to do with it. You can see on CD7 how elevated my temperature was. That was the day I felt the worst effects. Severe headache, dizziness, and fatigue.
My temps finally went back down after it was fixed and I am feeling so much better. I really hope I Ovulate soon. I did have a bit of Creamy CM on CD12 which usually comes before I O. But I have no evidence it happened or that it will happen in the next 48 hours :(
My temps finally went back down after it was fixed and I am feeling so much better. I really hope I Ovulate soon. I did have a bit of Creamy CM on CD12 which usually comes before I O. But I have no evidence it happened or that it will happen in the next 48 hours :(
January 12, 2012
Funny But Not Really
So earlier in the week I posted that I hadn't been feeling to well this week. My temp has been elevated, I've had severe dizziness, terrible headaches, extreme fatigue, and have felt down right lethargic. It has NOT been fun.
For the past couple of months every time I would go to the bathroom I would smell a TERRIBLE smell. I thought it was 1 of 2 things.
1) I close the lid every time I flush so no nasty poo particles don't fly in the air to find my toothbrush. So I thought maybe that is what was causing a strange odor in the toilet bowl. Maybe the funk was just attaching to the lid or whatever and building up causing the disgusting stench.
OR
2) My vajayjay was creating some disturbing odor that needed to be addressed by a trained medical professional.....ASAP. I mean it was FUNKY. Like some nasty girl with rotten cooty funky. I know......sounds digusting. But I promise I shower every single day. I was really starting to get paranoid!
Well, come to find out................our toilet is leaking sewer gasses! Praise the lord my cooty don't stink! Mr. Buckeye Bud and I have been in the process of flipping an old farm house for the past 5 years. We relocated the bathroom but he never completely did everything he needed to do with it. So the toilet hasn't been sealed properly for FIVE YEARS!
Can you believe that? He is fixing it as we speak so I pray these symptoms go away ASAP. Just thought I would share this because I find it incredibly disgusting and dangerous! Oh, also entertaining in the fact that I actually thought that was my body producing that funk!
For the past couple of months every time I would go to the bathroom I would smell a TERRIBLE smell. I thought it was 1 of 2 things.
1) I close the lid every time I flush so no nasty poo particles don't fly in the air to find my toothbrush. So I thought maybe that is what was causing a strange odor in the toilet bowl. Maybe the funk was just attaching to the lid or whatever and building up causing the disgusting stench.
OR
2) My vajayjay was creating some disturbing odor that needed to be addressed by a trained medical professional.....ASAP. I mean it was FUNKY. Like some nasty girl with rotten cooty funky. I know......sounds digusting. But I promise I shower every single day. I was really starting to get paranoid!
Well, come to find out................our toilet is leaking sewer gasses! Praise the lord my cooty don't stink! Mr. Buckeye Bud and I have been in the process of flipping an old farm house for the past 5 years. We relocated the bathroom but he never completely did everything he needed to do with it. So the toilet hasn't been sealed properly for FIVE YEARS!
Can you believe that? He is fixing it as we speak so I pray these symptoms go away ASAP. Just thought I would share this because I find it incredibly disgusting and dangerous! Oh, also entertaining in the fact that I actually thought that was my body producing that funk!
January 11, 2012
Same Old Thing.....
Well nothing new to report on. Aunt Flo came and went. I am currently on CD7. My temp has been going up the past few days though. But I think I am getting sick and my house has been crazy hot the past couple of days. All day today I've had a headache and have been super dizzy. I dont wanna get sick! grrrrr. My chart could look like I O'd on CD4 orCD5 but that just can't be right because AF was still in town. So I'm just dismissing that bologna.
I'm gonna start my OPK's when I get home from work tonight. My plan is to do the BD once I get a positive OPK and do it for atleast 4 days after that. I would think I would be covered with that. And if I don't get KU this month I'm sending Mr.Buckeye Bud for some "analysis."
I'm gonna start my OPK's when I get home from work tonight. My plan is to do the BD once I get a positive OPK and do it for atleast 4 days after that. I would think I would be covered with that. And if I don't get KU this month I'm sending Mr.Buckeye Bud for some "analysis."
Okay, that's all I have for now. Hope everyone is doing well! Peace and hair grease!
January 3, 2012
The New Years Celebration is Over Rated
Well, 2012 is a bust already. My temps were rising at one point but now they are decreasing. Aunt Flo is def on her way to see me.
-Buckeye Bud
-Buckeye Bud
December 26, 2011
Two Week Wait Please Fly By
So, I am currently on CD19. FF FINALLY gave me a crosshair on Christmas Morning. However it wasn't where I wanted it. Here is what my past week looks like.
12/18- CD11- Did the BD. BFN on OPK.
12/19- CD 12- Did the BD. BFP on OPK
12/20-CD 13- Did the BD. BFP on OPK
12/21-CD 14- BFN on OPK.
12/23-CD 16- Did the BD.
12/25 CD 18- Finally got a cross hair that says I O'd on 12/21 CD14
So here I am 5DPO. I've had a lot of sharp pains in what feels like my ovaries or tubes . I don't know what to make of this. Today I feel kind of crampy and bloated. I'm not gonna psych myself up tho. I'm tired of being let down. So if I don't let myself get my hopes up then the smack in the face wont hurt so bad. I know I should remain positive and all that hooplah but I find it impossible at this point. Nothing good has ever come of me being excited and optimistic. Call me Negative Nancy.
I do want to share this site that I found before I forget! It is a database of actual pregnancy symptoms submitted by pregnant women. There are different categories on the left side (i.e. BFP after miscarriage, BFP with PCOS, etc) so be sure to check those out. This site is addicting! However, it might aide in more obsessing during your own TWW.
http://www.twoweekwait.com/
Enjoy!
-Buckeye Bud
12/18- CD11- Did the BD. BFN on OPK.
12/19- CD 12- Did the BD. BFP on OPK
12/20-CD 13- Did the BD. BFP on OPK
12/21-CD 14- BFN on OPK.
12/23-CD 16- Did the BD.
12/25 CD 18- Finally got a cross hair that says I O'd on 12/21 CD14
So here I am 5DPO. I've had a lot of sharp pains in what feels like my ovaries or tubes . I don't know what to make of this. Today I feel kind of crampy and bloated. I'm not gonna psych myself up tho. I'm tired of being let down. So if I don't let myself get my hopes up then the smack in the face wont hurt so bad. I know I should remain positive and all that hooplah but I find it impossible at this point. Nothing good has ever come of me being excited and optimistic. Call me Negative Nancy.
I do want to share this site that I found before I forget! It is a database of actual pregnancy symptoms submitted by pregnant women. There are different categories on the left side (i.e. BFP after miscarriage, BFP with PCOS, etc) so be sure to check those out. This site is addicting! However, it might aide in more obsessing during your own TWW.
http://www.twoweekwait.com/
Enjoy!
-Buckeye Bud
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