It's funny how once you want to have a baby and are actively TTC all those signals your body was giving you before, that you just ignored, are now flashing at you like a neon sign in Las Vegas. Who knew ovulation pain could be so significant? Man my ovaries were trying to tell me something the past 48 hours. You better believe Mr.Travel Bud and I acted on that sign.
I'm trying to be more proactive than that, though. Even though my cycles have been like clockwork the past 7 months I don't trust the thought of my O-date always being the same. It would be normal if you had a 28 day cycle to ovulate on the CD14 but I just don't trust it. Like this month I felt O-pain on the right side on Sunday and then on the left side yesterday. I want to get this timing thing down as best as possible so I bought OPKs at Walgreens yesterday. When I went home to test it wasn't quite positive yet but we BD'd anyway but I'm hoping today I get the full green light and then we'll BD again tonight. :)
More and more each day I just think about being a Mom and how I feel it's just something that will come so naturally to me. I know that might sound kind of dumb. But sometimes I feel that women were designed to be mothers. There's just this connection that I feel whenever I hold a baby and when people I know see me interacting with a baby, they always comment that I look like such a natural.
My ute is dying to have a baby inside. I can just tell. Everyone at my work is nagging me about the fact that I need to have the next baby. I'm working on it ladies, I'm working on it. Hopefully this cycle is successful.
This baby is a work in progress.
Showing posts with label Travel Bud. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Travel Bud. Show all posts
January 19, 2010
January 11, 2010
Leah Jane
I'm not going to say much because honestly I don't have much time. But I'll be back later, I promise.
I did want to share with you a dream that I had that I cannot get out of my head. It's linked to another blog of mine. It's a more private blog, but this is pertinent to what I feel I'm going through, so have a look.
Our Beautiful Chaos--Leah Jane
Until next time,
Travel Bud
I did want to share with you a dream that I had that I cannot get out of my head. It's linked to another blog of mine. It's a more private blog, but this is pertinent to what I feel I'm going through, so have a look.
Our Beautiful Chaos--Leah Jane
Until next time,
Travel Bud
December 22, 2009
A 2WW for Christmas
I have one day and one and a half hours of work left before I'm released for Christmas Vacation. So little of me wants to work right now that it's probably illegal. I just have no motivation to do any of my work. All I can think about is what I'm looking forward to eating for Christmas, wondering what I might get for Christmas from my parents (who always go above and beyond for no particular reason) and thinking about the idea of being pregnant.
Working for a baby supply company doesn't reduce my baby fever at all. Most people I know are deceived that if I'm around baby stuff and babies all day long (because working moms can bring their babies to work with them) that it is going to suppress that feeling of wanting to be a mom. What a joke! It's like telling someone who loves Oreos to stand in front of a freakin conveyor belt of Oreos and not touch one. What a tease!!!
To be completely honest, not many people know that we are TTC because frankly they would throw a fit. This is why I feel it's important for a short while for Mr. Travel Bud and I to keep our anonymous status in order to protect ourselves from outlashes. For serious. I did decide though that I needed to share my thoughts and feelings with people somehow since my mother looks like she's going to faint if I mention the idea of her being a grandma in her early 40s and any of my friends think I'm too young or wasting my life by wanting to have children so early. It's difficult to feel alone and not have any support, besides Mr. Travel Bud. I know that someday when I tell my mom I'm pregnant she'll eventually be happy, but I think she has irrational fears of me being just like her throughout my adult life. My mother had me when she was around 20 years old and she begged me to wait to get married until I graduated college, that didn't happen, and then she begged me to wait until I was about 27 or 28 to start having kids, and that probably won't happen. I think she just wants me to have a more easy and fulfilling life, which I appreciate her concern, but it's heartbreaking to know that if I had to tell my mom about being KU she'd have an adverse reaction initially. I want that moment to be a happy moment, not something I'm afraid of doing. This is why TTC for us is so hush hush. There's no need to give my mother any indication that we're TTC because there's no need to give her a premature heart attack.
My best friend is getting married soon and the last thing on her mind is having kids. She actually loathes the idea of having a baby someday, so talking to her is not the way to look for understanding or support. Plus, she'd probably have a little bit of an issue with me being 7 months pregnant at her wedding. Yikes. Most of my friends are not at the age where they're thinking about kids so it's hard to have people around as support. Most of my friends that are moms are a good 5-10 years older than I am. For me, I know I'm young, but if the doctor recommends that I try earlier on, I'm doing that to avoid as much heartbreak as possible with the looming thought of IF issues. With endometriosis running in my family there's no need for me to be naiive and put it off, when I could be proactive now and do everything I can to conceive in the easiest manner possible. If it comes down to it in the future, of course I'd go to any length to have a baby, but if I can avoid the heartache by taking preventative or proactive measures now, I will.
As for now in this cycle, I'm in the 2WW and should be able to test around the 3rd or 4th of January. I'm not feeling very hopeful this cycle as much BDing didn't go down between Mr. Travel Bud and I due to sickness a few nights, and an argument another night. It'd be nice to have that NY BFP, but I think I'm out this cycle. Until then, I'm just ready to enjoy Christmas with my family and friends.
Until next time,
Travel Bud
Working for a baby supply company doesn't reduce my baby fever at all. Most people I know are deceived that if I'm around baby stuff and babies all day long (because working moms can bring their babies to work with them) that it is going to suppress that feeling of wanting to be a mom. What a joke! It's like telling someone who loves Oreos to stand in front of a freakin conveyor belt of Oreos and not touch one. What a tease!!!
To be completely honest, not many people know that we are TTC because frankly they would throw a fit. This is why I feel it's important for a short while for Mr. Travel Bud and I to keep our anonymous status in order to protect ourselves from outlashes. For serious. I did decide though that I needed to share my thoughts and feelings with people somehow since my mother looks like she's going to faint if I mention the idea of her being a grandma in her early 40s and any of my friends think I'm too young or wasting my life by wanting to have children so early. It's difficult to feel alone and not have any support, besides Mr. Travel Bud. I know that someday when I tell my mom I'm pregnant she'll eventually be happy, but I think she has irrational fears of me being just like her throughout my adult life. My mother had me when she was around 20 years old and she begged me to wait to get married until I graduated college, that didn't happen, and then she begged me to wait until I was about 27 or 28 to start having kids, and that probably won't happen. I think she just wants me to have a more easy and fulfilling life, which I appreciate her concern, but it's heartbreaking to know that if I had to tell my mom about being KU she'd have an adverse reaction initially. I want that moment to be a happy moment, not something I'm afraid of doing. This is why TTC for us is so hush hush. There's no need to give my mother any indication that we're TTC because there's no need to give her a premature heart attack.
My best friend is getting married soon and the last thing on her mind is having kids. She actually loathes the idea of having a baby someday, so talking to her is not the way to look for understanding or support. Plus, she'd probably have a little bit of an issue with me being 7 months pregnant at her wedding. Yikes. Most of my friends are not at the age where they're thinking about kids so it's hard to have people around as support. Most of my friends that are moms are a good 5-10 years older than I am. For me, I know I'm young, but if the doctor recommends that I try earlier on, I'm doing that to avoid as much heartbreak as possible with the looming thought of IF issues. With endometriosis running in my family there's no need for me to be naiive and put it off, when I could be proactive now and do everything I can to conceive in the easiest manner possible. If it comes down to it in the future, of course I'd go to any length to have a baby, but if I can avoid the heartache by taking preventative or proactive measures now, I will.
As for now in this cycle, I'm in the 2WW and should be able to test around the 3rd or 4th of January. I'm not feeling very hopeful this cycle as much BDing didn't go down between Mr. Travel Bud and I due to sickness a few nights, and an argument another night. It'd be nice to have that NY BFP, but I think I'm out this cycle. Until then, I'm just ready to enjoy Christmas with my family and friends.
Until next time,
Travel Bud
December 21, 2009
Travel Bud Intro
Hello blogging world, I’m Travel Bud. I’m in my early 20’s and Mr. Travel Bud and I were married in May of 2008. We always planned on having kids someday but TTC was to wait until after we accomplished some other things in life. We had plans for me to finish college (still in the plans) and then travel overseas to teach English (still in the plans) before we had children. Life was getting really rough on me and I was tired of my routine I had so I quit my job at a restaurant and got a new job that’s full time so that I could have more steady hours and steady pay and see Mr. Travel Bud a little more frequently. I mean we did get married so we could be with each other more and it seemed like since we were married we saw each other less, that wasn’t okay with me. I also enrolled for classes online in order to continue my education but still be able to work full time. The plan was to work at the full time job for the last year I needed to finish up school and then do our overseas thing and then come home and have children. I felt like I had it all going for me and things were finally going in the right direction.
Oh how life likes to slap you in the face sometimes! The online school I enrolled in was a bust. If I had continued on I would have wasted my time and my money and my degree wouldn’t have taken me very far in life. So, Mr. Travel Bud and I came to a crossroads. We realized that as much as you plan out life, sometimes life just takes its own course. We decided to keep these goals in mind but if life took another route we would be okay with it. Even the idea of taking our child overseas doesn’t scare us simply because we’ve always had a heart for traveling and going wherever God decided to have us go. So now, we’re at a point where we’re not actively trying like checking every single sign to see if I’m ovulating, but we are just having a good time together and enjoying life together until God chooses the right time to bless us with kids.
I must say I’m quite relieved that we decided to just go for it now and not wait because my family has a history of Endometriosis and PCOS which has caused some serious heartbreak for my mother and my aunt and I just want to avoid that as much as possible and my doctor said that the earlier we try to have children the more successful we may be. I’ve always had very painful periods, cramps that are debilitating and have even put me in the hospital before. Going through those experiences each month have really created a concern that Mr. Travel Bud never fully understood. When my Mom was recently diagnosed with Endometriosis is when he finally started to realize that this could be a serious issue so he went to the doctor with me so we could get some questions answered. The doctor said I have early stages of endo and low progesterone so it’s good that we caught it now so we can do everything we can to have kids before it would get too serious. I told him how there’s this balancing crème that helps balance out your estrogen and progesterone levels that I’m thinking about taking to see if that has any positive effect on my situation and he said it would be worth the try. So that’s where I’m at right now in this whole stage. I only charted one month, but took a break because of the chaos of the holidays, I’ll probably start back up again next cycle but until then I’m taking that balancing crème and just having fun BDing with Mr. Travel Bud as much as possible. I’m excited to share our journey in TTC and all of the other surprises and turns that our life might take until then.
Until next time,
Travel Bud
Oh how life likes to slap you in the face sometimes! The online school I enrolled in was a bust. If I had continued on I would have wasted my time and my money and my degree wouldn’t have taken me very far in life. So, Mr. Travel Bud and I came to a crossroads. We realized that as much as you plan out life, sometimes life just takes its own course. We decided to keep these goals in mind but if life took another route we would be okay with it. Even the idea of taking our child overseas doesn’t scare us simply because we’ve always had a heart for traveling and going wherever God decided to have us go. So now, we’re at a point where we’re not actively trying like checking every single sign to see if I’m ovulating, but we are just having a good time together and enjoying life together until God chooses the right time to bless us with kids.
I must say I’m quite relieved that we decided to just go for it now and not wait because my family has a history of Endometriosis and PCOS which has caused some serious heartbreak for my mother and my aunt and I just want to avoid that as much as possible and my doctor said that the earlier we try to have children the more successful we may be. I’ve always had very painful periods, cramps that are debilitating and have even put me in the hospital before. Going through those experiences each month have really created a concern that Mr. Travel Bud never fully understood. When my Mom was recently diagnosed with Endometriosis is when he finally started to realize that this could be a serious issue so he went to the doctor with me so we could get some questions answered. The doctor said I have early stages of endo and low progesterone so it’s good that we caught it now so we can do everything we can to have kids before it would get too serious. I told him how there’s this balancing crème that helps balance out your estrogen and progesterone levels that I’m thinking about taking to see if that has any positive effect on my situation and he said it would be worth the try. So that’s where I’m at right now in this whole stage. I only charted one month, but took a break because of the chaos of the holidays, I’ll probably start back up again next cycle but until then I’m taking that balancing crème and just having fun BDing with Mr. Travel Bud as much as possible. I’m excited to share our journey in TTC and all of the other surprises and turns that our life might take until then.
Until next time,
Travel Bud
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