July 26, 2010

Where We Go From Here

First of all, I wanted to give a heart-felt thank you to the Bloomin' Babies community. You have all been so supportive, thoughtful and informative. I am so thankful to be part of this little "family."

Mr. SB and I had an appointment with our RE to talk about our next steps. It seems that I have been pretty much tested for everything except for a chromosome defect called Balanced Translocation.

I won't bore you with the details of this again, as it can be found in Blessed Bud's post, a couple below this one.

After emailing with our lovely Dandelion Bud, if the balanced translocation test comes back normal, I think I am going to get a second opinion. It seems like they cannot find anything that is wrong with me. In fact, my RE said it was surprising how normal my tests actually were - not a defect in sight, which is just my luck.

I'm scared to death of my chromosome test coming back positive. That is a whole different shit storm that I am not ready to deal with. The thought of having to go through more miscarriages to "hopefully" have a normal pregnancy literally takes me breath away. The nurse at my RE's office told me that they have never seen this many miscarriages in someone so young, which to be honest with you, made me want to neck punch her.

So right now, we have put actively TTC on hold. This test will take about 5 weeks to come back, and now we are going to try to relax, exercise and start having sex for fun instead of reproduction (even though I know I will not be able to help myself with CBE Smileys because they are just so. freaking. cool)! I will not be going back on birth control, so if it happens, it happens.

Its time for a much needed physical and mental break.


Sunflower Bud said...

DB made me go get a second opinion and I could kiss her for her persistence. Best thing I could ever do for myself and my peace of mind. Not pregnant yet but I'm MUCH closer to it than I was with my last RE.

It's terrifying to get positive test results that are actually a bad thing but the positive side is that it's an actual answer and you aren't left in the dark wondering what in the hell is going on. I'm hoping that it's negative though and that a second opinion sheds more light on what is actually going on. I ended up with a diagnosis that was NOTHING like my original one.

Fun sex is sooo much better than TTC sex. :) Enjoy it for a little while and then get back to the grind! (pun intended)

Blessed Bud said...

SB I am praying for both of us. The break that we took during June and July was totally needed and well worth it. I pray you don't have a Balanced Translocation. Our stories are so similar Sweetie and we just have to get back up and keep fighting until our LO's are in our arms. ((HUGS))

Silver Rose said...

I agree, you should have punched her! *easy to say, but obviously not the right choice* With my endo, I've had horrible pain with exams and paps and a nurse actually said to me, while I was in tears, "You know a speculum is smaller than a penis, right?" Sometimes people don't hear themselves when they speak.

Sarcastic Bud said...

SB - I'm def. looking forward to the fun sex...woo hoo! Haha.

I agree with you about a positive result, however, I do not want a positive result that our RE cannot fix. But we will cross that bridge when we come to it. Thanks for your support. :)

BB - I've been keeping you in my thoughts and prayers as well. I hope that you receive another BFP next month and I will send you mounds and mounds of baby dust!

SR - That is a horrible story! I belive we should all be allowed to have one free neck punch ;)


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