February 6, 2010

A whole other group of people who will never understand

All along while going through the torture that is infertility and IVF, I have thought that no matter what, there was one group of people who "got it". Other girls who have done IVF. That was a no brainer. Now I know that's not necessarily true.

My husband and I went to a counselor this week. She was great and we really liked her. We got her name from our RE, because she specializes in infertility.
What I didn't realize was that she specializes in it, because she lived it. She did 9 IVFs. She has 1 biological child and 2 adopted. It was sitting in her office that I realized for the first time that I was normal. I felt normal. She got me. Completely. Every emotion.

Feeling normal was so nice.

I have 2 girls at work that I talk to who have done IVF. One of them goes to our RE, and they're both dealing with MFI also. They've always been such a support, but over the past few days, it's become obvious that they just don't get it.

The one that goes to my RE has done IVF 2 times and it's worked both times. She has 4 children (one older daughter from a previous relationship, 3 year old twins and a baby). The other is 23 weeks pregnant with twins from her first IVF. They just can't understand the disappointment of it NOT working, and furthermore, finding out something else is wrong.

I found that out when they both told me this week to relax and it would happen.

I can't believe someone who went through IVF just told me to relax and it would happen.

We're going to go back to the counselor. I really liked feeling normal - and NOT being told to relax.
It's nice to have someone in my life - even if i'm paying her - who understands how much this sucks from firsthand experience.


Ms. Understood said...

It's always great to find a place where you feel completely at ease and understood. Glad to hear that you have that place. I hope that IVF #2 is a success.

Worry Bud said...

I'm so happy you found a counselor who understands & you feel comfortable with. Talking to someone who understands helps so so much! GL DB...I'm always praying for you. :o)


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