December 11, 2009

Are We There Yet? Are We There Yet?

Although it reminds me of a long family road trip circa 1989, the lingering question remains, "Are we there yet?"

Unfortunately this time the question refers to TTC. DH is ready. I am ready. Our careers are not, and there are a whole lot of four letter words that could describe how I feel about that. DH and I were SURE we would be TTC at this point. We were both SURE that DH would have a job by now. We were both SURE that it couldn't possibly take me so long to find a different job in my field. We were SURE we would have a 2010 baby. Now I am positive that we were both wrong about the first three statements, and likely wrong about the fourth. Frustration doesn't even begin to describe what I am feeling.

I have spent a lot of time thinking, "why me?". While I don't generally feel it productive to wallow in self-pity, I would be lying if I said I hadn't done at least a little of this since I realized that my timeline was basically shot. Every day I say a little prayer that maybe today will be the day our luck changes. If you are the praying kind, I wouldn't mind having some additional shout-outs going up. I know that things can turn around quickly. I know that maybe on Monday DH will get an interview, or I will make an awesome connection, or somehow everything will fall into place a little bit better than it is now. I know that things will not always be this challenging. But I think I need an extra dose of God's grace to keep me going right now.


Jen J. said...

GL FB - I will definitely send a few prayers up on your behalf!


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