August 24, 2009

High Stress!


Are you kidding!? In the past week, I have had 5, count 'em, 1.... 2..... 3.... 4.... 5 emotional meltdowns over nothing! NOTHING! and I'm not even TTC much less KU! Are you kidding me?Everything that has been happening with trying to find and hire a new part-time co-worker at work, (which I finally just found someone, Thank God), having to shell out more money to fix two cars, and trying to find how to pay of Mr. BrainyBud's tuition soon has just been too much to deal with.

Now, what do these emotional, crying uncontrollably, get upset at the drop of a hat, breakdowns have to do with TTC? Well, considering that all of these things disrupt the calm of my life and attribute to my very high stress levels.

See, if I couldn't find an assistant, that would create more work for me (we work as a team), and I wouldn't be able to take the time needed if we did have a baby. I constantly worry about what is to come and wanting my career to be easy-going considering I will be a working mother.

Well, car fixes are bound to happen, I know this. But I'm just fed up with my Jeep and how the window continues to fall down and we have to replace it. It is only 2 years old, come on! So, I went car shopping after a week's worth of research on the safest SUVs (thinking of our future child) and the most dependable SUV (so that we wouldn't have to break the piggy bank constantly) and I found the car I wanted but after they ran the numbers, we couldn't afford it. The dealership wouldn't even budge on the price either. I am so mad at our Jeep I could toss it out the window because I really want to purchase a better SUV, with wisdom this time.

Finding money to pay for college and medical bills has been my lot in life the last 3 months, but I think that I have finally sorted it all out. Again, I feel that all of this has to be taken care of before we TTC because once the baby comes, the finances are going to be all out of sorts again.

Anyways, I have been stressed out more than normal thinking of how every decision we make today will know influence the life we will be able to give our child. My high stress levels lately would surely result in a m/c if I was PG, I could guarantee it; and that makes me worry even more. I have one month to figure out how to control my stress before TTC. Any suggestions on staying calm going into the TTC process?

Faith, Love, and Baby Flutters
Mrs. Brainy Bud

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