October 5, 2010

My uterus sucks after all

After 3 days of extra estrogen pills and POM juice, my lining has not shown any improvement. The doctor wasn't there today and the nurse admitted she was worried. I asked her if she thought it could be scarring from the D&C (known as Asherman's Syndrome) and she said maybe. She wanted to talk with the doctor first before saying any more. I was thinking of just canceling this cycle, freezing what embryos we have (we'll know details tomorrow), and then having another hysteroscopy to check for scarring. The doctor, on the other hand, wants to increase my estrogen dosage and check again on Friday, thus in my mind postponing the inevitable. If I don't have a miracle with one estrogen pill once a day, I don't know how I can expect a miracle after doubling the dose.

I think today was the first time I ever cried at the RE's office. The nurse was sympathetic and told me she'd struggled with infertility herself. I ended up calling in sick because I had 3 meetings in the morning and there's no way I'd be presentable, let alone functional today. Of course now it's after noon and I'm going stir crazy waiting for the doctor to call. I have my work laptop with me but sadly my biggest accomplishment so far is finishing up two DVDs to send back to Netflix.

Can this get any harder?
Can our luck get any worse?

Unfortunately given our history, the worst is yet to come. 

I'll sign in for our fert report tomorrow and after my next ultrasound on Friday.

Golden Bud



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