Well, the Betas are in and they are shit. I knew this was going to happen when I started spotting yesterday. Even though it was brown spotting, I knew what was coming. I've gone through it 3 times prior - I'm pretty much an expert!
So welcome miscarriage #4. You would think that I would be thrown a bone. At least one of these pregnancies should have been viable, right? Apparently not.
It is just so unfair. What a crock of shit it is that a financially stable, responsible, very much in-love couple cannot have a child. And I am just not saying this for me - I'm saying it for all of us that have been through or are going through this.
The thing that really gets me is that my body is perfect. Yes, I could afford to lose a few pounds, but that's about it. They have not been able to find a single thing that is medically wrong with me. I have had every test know to man done on me, and am surprised that I haven't been mistaken for a heroin addict, being that I have been a human pincushion for the past two years.
Wow, two years. Two years of trying to conceive only to end up with heartbreak in the end. Happy Anniversary to us.
I have an appointment with the RE next Wednesday. They are talking about shipping me up to The Cleveland Clinic for IVF with genetic testing.
I don't know what else to write. Infertility sucks.
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6 comments:
damn it damn it damn it.
*hugs* I'm so sorry SB. You're right, it isn't fair - and its especially frustrating when you have zero answers. I'll keep you and your Dh in my T&P.
<3 Makeup Bud
This is so far from fair. I am so sorry this is happening. ::hugs::
NO!!! I am so sorry. I am in shock!! I can't believe this is happening to you again. I am so pissed off for you. And so heartbroken. :(
Oh no! :( my heart is going out to you... This is so hard, and yes, totally unfair. I am sending out t&p to you and many positive vibes.
My heart breaks when I read your post. I am so so sorry. I know EXACTLY what you mean when you say that it is BS that a good, caring couple, who is financially stable and working hard cant have kids. It makes me so mad. I am thinking of you!!!
I hear you and totally get the bitterness. I hope IVF gives you some answers. You are not alone!
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