No News Is.......Well......No News

I feel as if I havn't blogged in a while so here I am. Nothing too much to report though. I did get my appointment set up with the endocrinologist. They sent me my paper work and set up an appointment for April. Wait.....April? Yeah, pretty stinking ridiculous. I ended up calling them couple days later so I could be added to a cancellation list. It worked because I got a phone call yesterday saying they could see me this upcoming Tuesday. I'm sooooooo excited! I feel like this might actually give me some of the answers I've been looking for for so long. This journey began in September 2010 and it feels like 10 years ago. After 3 miscarriages, 1 ectopic pregnancy, and now infertility, I am so ready finally get my baby.

I know this might sound crazy, but I am praying for a PCOS diagnosis. I have almost ALL of the symptoms so I hope the blood work I get will show my hormones just aren't right. My testosterone was high about a month ago so I hope it hasn't gone back done, otherwise I'm afraid they wont give me any med's.

I got a positive OPK tonight. I figure we will do the BD for the next 3 days just in case. I hasn't worked the past 4 months so it's a long shot that it would work this month. I havn't started using my CBEFM yet. I wanna wait until my hormones are perfect before I use those expensive test strips!
Here is my current chart. I have FF so confused. Check out how many fertile days it has me set at! My cycles are so jacked right now!

Well, that is all for now. I will post again this week after I see my Endo. Cross your fingers for me! Oh, and a HUGE shout-out to Diva Bud for her AMAZING news! Congrats girl.....you deserve it!

A few good signs...

I've been walking on air the past few days... I can hardly believe my wish and prayers came true! Even though I still have a bit of worry at the back of my mind, I am staying super positive, and enjoying the symptoms (which is strange, since they haven't been too great). But, more about that in a moment.

For starters, my HPTs have gotten progressively darker, which is great... Take a look:

11DPO @ 9pm




12DPO - FMU




14 DPO - FMU




I have one EPT left, which I am saving for early next week, but I am pretty sure this is happening.

I was looking into a new OB, since my most recent experiences with the one I had were not good, and found one 3 blocks away from my house! They seem great, and I plan on calling this afternoon and setting my first appointment. I am hoping they can bring me in soon, at least to do a blood test and confirm.

About my symptoms? They sort of come and go... I've had a bit of nausea and slightly sore breasts, but yesterday I got a major headache. I ate dinner, and then felt super nauseous, so I took a shower and went to bed - at 8:30PM!!! Yeah, I was exhausted. Oh, and today, my sense of smell seems a bit sensitive.

Let's hope this is all a good sign. :)




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24 Weeks

This week are baby is officially viable! It is hard to believe that my friends 3 year old twins were born at 24 weeks. I am happy to say that they are perfectly healthy and both thriving! They are both little miracles!

We met with our donors last weekend. At 24 weeks is also the when our donor mom went into labor with her twins. She went on strict bed rest and was on her back for 12 weeks until they were born. I cannot imagine 3 months of not getting out of bed.

So, as you can see, we finally met our donors! This is something we have been looking forward to, and anticipating since we were matched. Our donors are wonderful, and it was so nice to finally be able to meet them. They even brought their 3 year old boy/girl twins, which I wasn't expecting. It was really cool to get a glimpse at what our daughter could look like.
I was touched to hear how much work and effort they put into just being accepted as donors by the National Embryo Donation Center. There was a lot of testing and paperwork that they had to go through in order to donate their embryos.

I also really felt for the mom, who this was clearly a difficult decision for. I could see that along with her happiness that their embryo will be able to have a life, there was also sadness that they weren't able to have her themselves. It makes me sad to see her pain. Thinking of being in their shoes, I honestly don't know if it is something I could do myself. I am so grateful for what they have done for us.

At 24 weeks our babies face is basically complete, and looking much like she will look when she is born. I am still feeling great with pretty much no pregnancy symptoms. I still have a cold, but am starting to feel a bit better. It is good because I have not been sleeping well with being so congested. I have my yoga class each week, which I look forward to. I am 153 lbs now. That is... 18 lbs over my pre pregnancy weight. Yikes. The pounds are adding up fast these days.

Baby girl is moving around tons these days. I am looking more into names lately. I think we do want an Indian name after all (did I mention our donors are East Indian?), so I am looking more at Sanskrit/Hindu names and trying to find one that I like that will be easy to pronounce and spell for Americans. I don't really know any Indian names right now, I am going to have to look at them one by one on the name website I have and see what stands out. Are there any Indian girl names that you know that you like?

24 Weeks

Soon....

We're still waiting for AF to arrive so that we can begin our FET. According to my calendar, she should be arriving this weekend. I've been really crampy ALL week, so I think she'll be here soon. I've never been more excited for a period to come!

On a sad note, my grandpa passed away this afternoon. He was a wonderful man, and he will be greatly missed. I know he's holding our little baby in his arms right now. Thank you all for your prayers.



Bossy Bud

A Valentine's Surprise <3

Hello everyone :) I hope you all had a wonderful Valentine's Day, celebrating Love and Friendship!

I had the honor or surprising Mr. DBud with the news of my BFP. Here's how that went down.

When Mr. DBud got home, we exchanged gifts. I got him a few XBOX accessories, and he got me a couple of Pandora charms for my bracelet. We hung out around the house until it was time to get ready for our Valentine's Date. When we got in the car, I told him I had another gift for him. I asked him to close his eyes, and hold out his hands. I turned on a light inside the car, and placed a square jewelry box in his hands. Then, I told him to open his eyes. When he did, he looked at the box, and at me, puzzled. He said, "what is this?", and I merely answered, "open it!". He did, and this is what he found...




At first he was confused. He looked at me, and I was just smiling at him. He looked back at the box and then back at me, and asked, "are you pregnant?", to which I replied, "yes. I am pregnant!". He was shocked and extremely happy. He leaned over and kissed me, and the rest is history.

We are so incredibly excited to expect our little October bundle. Of course, I am still deathly afraid of history repeating itself... But I am staying positive and thinking happy thoughts. Please, little baby, stay sticky for Mommy and Daddy. We already love you so much. <3




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The proof is in the Pudding

3 +s by 12DPO can't lie! I hope this is is, and we have a little sticker...




Now, I have to think of how I'm going to surprise Mr. DBud tonight. We have plans to go out for Valentine's, so I was thinking of something cute I can do for him.,, any suggestions???

So excited :)




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BFP?!

As per FF, I am 11DPO. I went and bought some HPTs to use tomorrow. Couldn't resist, and had to go real bad, so used one at 9pm when I got home...

2nd line or my imagination?! PLEASE discuss!!!!!

Thank god I have 4 more tests (FRER and E.P.T.)!!!!!







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A year ago...

I can't believe it... Today marks exactly one year since I got my official BFP (on a CBED), only to miscarry 4 days later, on Valentine's. Since I don't want to commemorate something depressing on a day used to celebrate love, I thought I would stay positive, and remember the "good" which occurred a year ago, today.

Getting my official BFP was such an awesome feeling! I hope that I can relive that feeling again... In the meantime, here is a little something for those Angel Babies we have lost...

"I didn't get to feel you kick, or look into your eyes. I didn't hold you in my arms, or hear your little cry. I didn't get to see your smile, or even know your name. But, you'll always be my baby and I love you just the same."
-Summer Herbst

Here's hoping our luck changes. All of us :)




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23 Weeks

I got a cold this week and have been feeling under the weather the past couple of days. I really hope the kids don't get it. They got their flu shots, so maybe that is why they have stayed well while Mr. Lucky Bud and I have gotten sick.

We are set up again to meet our embryo donors this Saturday since last time our plans got canceled due to the snow. I am excited and nervous at the same time to meet them. I hope they like us alright.

I gained 2 lbs this week. I now weigh 14 lbs over my pre pregnancy weight. I feel good except for my cold. I noticed a light linea nigra for the first time this week. The baby is moving around as much as ever. Sometimes I can feel her from the outside with my hand, as well as from the inside. The other day as I was getting into bed I got a REALLY sharp kick in the side. It kind of surprised me since that is the first really big movement I have felt so far.

As far as baby development, she should be just over 1 lb now. She should double in weight in the next four weeks which is pretty cool.

23 Weeks 

2WW madness!!

I HATE this part... The dreaded 2WW. With everything I have going, and with how busy I am, I still can't take my mind off of it. Especially when I enter my morning temp into FF and see a spike! I know it's too early at 7DPO, but I POAS for the heck of it. BFN, of course. I just hope that's not all I will see throughout the remainder of this cycle... Crossing my fingers for a BFP this month!!! :) :) :)



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