August 10, 2010

The Clomid Discussion

Tomorrow is The Appointment.

Tomorrow I meet with Dr. Baggins to discuss Clomid.

I have mixed feelings about it, to be honest. On the one hand, Mr. Cherry Bud and I are ready to be parents. We want to hold Little Cherry Bud in our arms and be Mommy and Daddy. On the other, there is a voice in the back of my brain that is insisting "Too soon!". This obnoxious little voice is firmly convinced that, despite Dr. Baggins's assurances otherwise, six months TTC is not long enough, and that we need to try for a few more months without pharmaceuticals before we take that next step. Notwithstanding that I am arguing with a voice in my head,

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I can't decide if this is the voice of reason or if it is my own pride, which, admittedly, wants the satisfaction of knowing I can conceive without medical intervention.

I should add that I knew Clomid was a possibility. Dr. Baggins told me so at my Pre-TTC appointment. I've been mentally preparing myself for it for the last few months. This didn't come as a surprise. What surprised me is how suddenly hesitant I am to "admit defeat" (words that spring unbidden from my brain every time I think of Clomid) and allow modern medicine to help me out. I am completely aware of how ridiculous this is, even when I'm in the middle of thinking it.

Even with my reservations, most of my brain is ready to be a Mom, regardless of what it takes.

My doctor is an understanding man, so I'll tell him all of this tomorrow and see what he thinks.

FYI: I tried to find a cartoon illustrating the whole "pride goeth before the fall" thing. I found nothing helpful, but did find many fascinating pictures from various LGBT Pride Events.

4 comments:

Aleksandra Nearing said...

After 6 months my doctor offered me clomed and I said no thanks. Personally, I didn't want any medical intervention. It took nearly 2 years from when I started TTC to when I finally had a successful pregnancy (miscarried twins at 13 weeks) but it happened.

I hope it happens for you soon! Best of luck!

Cherry Bud said...

I'm going back and forth about every ten minutes. I can see the pros and cons of both sides, and neither is winning at the moment.

Obsessive Bud said...

I personally took them after 6 months BUT I knew something was wrong after doing lots of testing and bloodwork. I was off BCP for 3 years and never once got KU and we didn't always use BCP. I spotted for days before my period and sometimes my period was just 1 day long.

Clomid worked for me. I knew and my RE knew I didn't create a strong egg from my labwork and my periods. We knew something wasn't right. I wouldn't just take it because I was impatient but if you know something isn't right and it can help go for it. There are also other drugs out there we were going to try but went with Clomid first. Good luck!

Sarcastic Bud said...

Clomid is not that bad of drug, don't listen to what people tell you. I responded very positively to it (besides mood swings..haha)and actually got a BFP from it.

The only advice I can give you is to make sure your doctor will MONITOR you on this drug. It produces cysts on some people and you need to be sure you are checked for this.

I promise you that you will not think of it as defeat when you have a little Cherry Bud as a result :)

 

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