November 30, 2011

13 Weeks/ Little Lucky Buds Adoption Story

Today I am 13 weeks pregnant. Our baby is about 3 inches long from crown to rump now. December 3rd marks the start of my second trimester, which is wonderful news. I am feeling so much better these days. I still get sick occasionally, but I am able to hold down meals for the most part, and I don't have the constant feeling of nausea all day that I used to feel. Really I am feeling great right now!

There is not too much to report for this weeks, so I thought that I would tell the story of how Little Lucky Bud (now 2 and a half) came into our family. Hopefully it is not too long. I always have a hard time keeping things short and focused, so here it goes...

Little Lucky Bud's birthmother, "Katie" (not her real name) was just turning 17 when she found out that she was 2 months pregnant. She had sisters that had had children very young, and had decided even before she became pregnant, that she would like to chose adoption if she was ever in the same possition. Once it became a reality, she knew that she could not provide for Little Lucky Bud, and wanted him to have the best life she could give him. She looked through some adoption profiles on an online website, and our profile stood out to her. She wanted to wait until she was three months along to write us. She looked at our profile everyday and by the time she wrote us, she was so excited to meet us. She already was feeling attatched to us and was very sweet in her email. We wrote everyday for the next two weeks until Mr. Lucky Bud and I drove to meet her in Michigan (we live in Maryland).

We spent four days with Katie and her family and we all got along great. Katie wanted to see us again, and Thanksgiving break worked best with her school schedule. We made plans for her to fly to see us then.

In the next month or two Katie struggled with her desion to adopt, and it was not clear what would happen. She felt pressured by her social worker, and all of her friends were telling her that they could never give their baby away.

We wanted to remain supportive, but did not want her to feel pressured, so we took a few steps back and communicated a little less with her. As Thanksgiving got closer we knew that it was a very strong possibilty that Katie might chose to parent her baby.

 To our surprise she did decided to come see us after all. On the way home from the airport we stopped for a bite to eat. Shortly after sitting down, Katie looked a little anxious and said that she had big news for us. She said that she could tell us now, or wait until Thanksgiving when we were with family. We wanted to know then of course. It was then, sitting at the Olive Garden that Katie said, "I don't know how you are supposed to say this, but I chose you. Will you be the parents of my baby." We were so happy and overwhelmed. More recently Katie has told me that after she officially decided on adoption, she felt at peace with her choice and did not struggle back and forth anymore. When we got home Katie showed us the ultrasound and had us guess the sex...and of course it was a boy!

Over the next few months we became much closer through emails. Scott and I visited Michigan again in January for another ultrasound. It was nice to spend more time with Katie, and to see the baby, and the we went home.

Upon Kaite request, I drove out to MI one week before Little Lucky Buds birth. Katie did not want to miss any  more school, and was determined to have him a week early (during spring break) and to have time to recover and head back to school just in time. Despite all of her efforts, Little Lucky Bud arrived exaclty on his due date. Katie really wanted Mr. Lucky Bud to be there for the birth also, but he was still driving, and arrived an hour after he was born. I was blessed to be there when our son was born.

It was an amazing expirience to watch our baby come into the world. As soon as I met him I was filled with such a deep love for him, and I couldn't imagine my life without him again.

I cut the umbilicle cord, and held him shortly after he was born. I had spent the past four months inducing lactation, and was able to feed him without a supplementer for the first week or so. It was an incredible bonding experience for us, for me to be able to breast feed him.

Kaite was extremely thoughtful during the whole adoption process, and wanted Little Lucky Bud to be able to bond with us as much as possible from the time he was born. The hospital gave us a room right next to Katie, and we were able to sleep the night with him in our room. Mr. Lucky Bud stayed up the entire night staring at our new precious baby.

We did have some issues the next morning with the hospital staff, and it was an extrememly difficult day. It seemed uncertain if we were going to be able to take him home at times. In Michigan the birthparents have 30 days to change their minds about adoption. From the time that I held Little Lucky Bud, I felt 100% as if I had carried him and given birth to him. I loved him so much. As you could probably imagine, the next 30 days were very difficult and emotional, not only for us but also for our sweet and wonderful birthmother. It was a glorious day for us when Little Lucky Bud legally belonged to us, and all of the stress and fears of losing him were past.
Little Lucky Bud enters the world
I had become a mother at last


Adoption changed our lives forever. I am so grateful for adoption and for the strength of our courageous, selfless birth mother. Thanksgiving will always be a special time for our family as we rember that very special visit with Katie.

Baby Lucky Bud joined our family Christmas Eve 2010, so you can expect to hear about his adoption story soon!

Lucky Bud

1 comment:

  1. What an amazing story!! I can't wait for Baby Lucky Bud's story!!

    ReplyDelete